I was walking with my chips and guac this afternoon, over to my bench by the feral kitties I sit at every Monday and Wednesday while waiting for my private lessons to begin. As I was walking, my mind wandered and I began to ponder what exactly I was doing this time last year. I thought about my job, my one friend, my home-life...
I admit I've fallen deep into that trap of longing for the past and forgetting to always see the wonderfulness of the present. But as I was walking, thinking about where I was - physically, emotionally and mentally - this time last year, it occurred to me that I wouldn't rather be anywhere but where I am. I don't even remember what life was like before my wonderful roomies. I don't even remember what life was like before my free nights wandering the streets of the beautifully enchanting city of Madrid and always finding a new, hidden street or a new, facinating building. I don't even remember what life was like before having a job inwhich I have complete freedom to use my creativity and my personality to teach and inspire tiny, optimistic people.
I believe it's safe to say that I've never felt this important and valued in so many peoples' lives at once - and certainly it's been a long while since I've felt this important and valued all on my own, by my little sweet self deep inside of me.
I no longer come home to an empty apartment and wonder when somebody is going to care enough to come home to me. My roommates are always so excited when I walk through that door. Every. Single Day. They always ask me all about my day. They always tell me all about theres. They always tell me how happy they are to see me or that they adore me or that I'm silly or that I'm crazy. They're always giggling with me (or at me - haha) and have a smile on their face. I feel like I'm somebody to them. I feel like they truly want to be around me. I feel like I positively impact their day. I feel like they would notice if I weren't around.
I didn't feel that way very often this time last year. Not at all. I KNEW I was important to someone, I KNEW I was adored, but I rarely truly felt like it. Instead I felt like I wasn't enough, like I wasn't deserving of time and energy and adoration. I felt like I was in the way. I felt like my presence was heavy. I felt like it was a chore to have me always around. I felt like I was in the way, or even sometimes forgotten. I didn't feel irreplaceable or adored for who I was in any sense of the word. I felt like I was broken and undeserving, and I didn't know what I'd done wrong nor how to fix it to get the attention and love I so craved.
This is in no way to blame anybody - other nor myself - but simply and observation. I read it in my chart far before it happened, so perhaps it was one of those moments in life that was created for some bigger reason. But to compare how I felt then to now - it's almost astonishing.
Those who are close to me but have never seen me out of my home country don't know this girl. This Chelsea is not the Chelsea that exists in America. This girl is autonomous and she knows it. She KNOWS her life is all up to her - and her alone - and is not just about to mess that up. Nobody in America has seen nor met this girl. They all think I go abroad to "run away from myself," but they don't understand that I'm running towards myself. This is where I thrive. This is where I can be who I am. How lucky I am to have found a place like that.
I was reading my "personal bible" the other day and flipped to the chapter about meditation for the first time. I'd always thought meditation was about clearing your mind, but when I read the chapter I was awestruck. He wrote about walking meditation, in which you walk for thirty minutes just taking in everything, observing every detail you can, seeing things from different perspectives, focusing on the minute details and the big picture all at once. The idea, he wrote, was that by doing this you became absolutely present in the "here and now." You couldn't help but be in the moment.
I smiled. THIS is what I do when I'm abroad. I could do this for days and never tire of it. I get off a random metro stop and I just start walking, looking at the buildings, the graffiti, the ground, the signs, the people, the pipes, the fonts, the food, the cracks, the stores, the sky, the posters, the lights - everything. I could spend a half hour on two blocks just taking it all in. I wander until I'm lost - that's when I'm happiest - and marvel at how much of the city I still haven't seen despite all of these long walks. While on these walks my past and my future don't exist - only the street before me and my divine and infinite curiousity and awe exist.
I then turned to the next meditation exercise - "Stopping." The writer suggests you do this multiple times and day and just stop whatever you're doing for 60 seconds and really focus intently on one thing around you. Oddly, I've always been very fond of doing just this. Last night, for example, on the metro I started focusing on the "Exit" drawing posted on the train. I started to wonder who drew it, how much he made, why he chose the color green, how he decided to put it on the left side of the train, why he didn't give the running man feet, what the designer's official title was, if he ever took the metro and marveled at his work, why he made the perspective so strange, etc. I became so immersed in this tiny sign that I didn't notice when three stops on the train went by and I was just about home.
At times it truly seems that appreciating and being curious about the tiniest things really makes it easier and more fun to examine things in your very personal life.
And so I want to take a paragraph to simply thank myself (myself from exactly 87 days ago) for being brave enough to risk everything she knew and held most important and dear and embark on this adventure. I know it was one of the hardest things you've had to do - I know it was scary and depressing and terrifying and lonely. I know you had to have a huge chunk of faith when faith was incredibly sparse. I know you often felt lost and like you had no idea what you were doing. I know you felt like you were throwing the only thing that kept you afloat away and you were completely unsure if you were making the gravest mistake of your life. But I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart and the depths of my soul for being brave enough to listen to that quiet little voice - to listen to me (to listen to yourself) - and to dive in all at once with everything you had in you.
I'm so very happy you're starting to see it now for yourself. I'm so very happy it's starting to make you happy again, because I know how sad you were for a very long time. I'm so happy you were brave enough to open yourself and listen to me when I would have those moments in which I could tell you to just keep going. But I want you to know - you haven't seen anything yet. This is only the beginning. Just because it's not scary and depressing and lonely anymore doesn't mean there isn't still an incredible amount of magic brewing behind the scenes - on the contrary! Now that we've gotten you back to the blissful place of self-love and support you were last summer, it's time to really start doing some incredibly, unbelieveably, wonderous and enchanted things.
And so I want to thank you for placing all of your faith into me (us) and risking it all. I promise not to disappoint you. <3 I'm so proud of how hard you worked and how devoted you've been. You keep up the moxie, the sanguinity and the tenacity and I'll keep up my end to find you the perfect people, places and experiences to help you create your dream life. Double pinkie swear promise. ;)
XOXO
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Day 86: Pen-pals and Tango
At the end of my first class of the day with a group of 5th graders, one of them suddenly shouted, "Oh! Today's Teacher's Day!" and without any warning, every single student jumped out of their seats and came barreling up to the front of the room to hug their teacher and me, shouting "Happy Teacher's Day!" and giving us kisses on our cheeks.
O_O
You'd think after three months I wouldn't be "culturally shocked" by much any more, but having twenty 10 year olds kissing my face and hugging me real tight was definitely completely bewildering to me. I kept thinking, "This can't be legal. Is this okay?" before realizing what country I was in and how touchy-feely everyone is here all the time. :)
A few class periods later I was with my favorite teacher. She began to tell me how Mr. Nacho's mom (who is the language teacher to the kids in Primary) was telling her how much Nacho loves me and how much he's learning from me. ^_^ To have my favorite teacher in the whole school telling me a compliment she'd heard about me was amazing! :)
I have been noticing that Nacho and the other boy I tutor have been getting oddly really good at English as compared to the day I began with them a few months ago, but I figured it was probably just because of their English classes at school. But maybe I'm just selling myself short? I mean Nacho is in the same grade as the girl I tutor and he speaks a million times better than she does. I teach his class one hour a week at school and talk to those kids and he's way better than they are.
When his mom approached me about tutoring him, she said she just wanted me to come over for two hours a week to play with him and hang out - all in English. She wanted him to become comfortable with the language and not shy to use it. She didn't need me to teach him specific things or use any books - just to make it seem fun. Thsoe first few weeks he wouldn't say a single word. He was scared and uncomfortable. But after we broke through that phase, he's been amazing. He'll only speak English for the entire hour and he never really tries to switch into Spanish. He loves having me over and when he doesn't know a word he'll just stop and look at me and I'll whisper it to him.
Considering this little guy is only a 6 year old in 1st grade, I suppose I really should be giving myself a little credit for his love of speaking a language which only weeks ago he refused to utter a single word in. He always begs his mom to let me come over on other afternoons and begs me not to leave. He even asks if he can come to my tango lessons because he loves dancing with me. :)
Then there's the second grader who I tutor. We have to use books sometimes because of his parents, but the times he learns the most is when we're playing soccer or with his cars. I remember a few weeks ago when his dad asked him what his name was and he couldn't even answer him. Now, he can tell you all about himself, all about his favorite mammals, amphibians, insects, birds, foods, etc. He knows more about viviparous and non-viviparous animals than I do (I didn't even KNOW that word before he taught it to me!).
As for his sister, I've taken to helping her with little craft projects and cutting things out and coloring things for it. But each time I cut or color, I have her answer a question in English about herself. This is how I started things out with her brother. Now when I go to cut she yells, "First - one question!!" It's really interesting to see how when she says something wrong and I repeat it back to her with corrections (but not "correcting her," rather just nodding my head and re-stating what she said correctly with excitement), it only takes me two or three times of doing this and suddenly she never makes that mistake again:
"What color is your dress?"
"My color dress is blue."
"Oh! Your dress is blue! What color is your skirt?"
"My color dress is red."
"Oh! Your dress is red! What color is your shirt?"
"My shirt is pink."
O_O
It's way impressive to listen to. Freak'n little kids!
I also started playing "foot phone" with her on accident this last lesson and she LOVED it. It's a thing Julia and I have done for forever when we're being silly - I never considered it as a way to teach English! Haha. She was laying on the floor and put her foot in the air so I grabbed it and said, "Hello!?" She immediately answered, "Hello!" It continued into a full conversation - all in English! The FIRST TIME she has spoken all in English. She thought it was so fun she kept "calling" me on her foot phone and doing the same conversation over and over - only she started asking ME the questions. It was way strange, but a delightful epiphany. :) Haha.
Anyway, on the way back to Nacho's house this afternoon for his "lesson," his mom put on a CD and Nacho started singing "You've Got a Friend in Me" from Toy Story! It was ADORABLE to hear him singing it - haha! Each class has to do their own song and dance in costume for the Christmas festival on the 21st of December, and that's the song his class is doing! I wish Woody could be there for it - haha! :)
After Nacho's class it was off to Madrid for Tango Tuesday. While on the train into the city, I got an email back from Mrs. Hinchey - my Spanish teacher from middle school!! She wrote me that my Spanish was AMAZING and that she would LOVE to have her 7th and 8th graders to become penpals with my students!!! ^_^ YAY!!! She has 130 students that could participate and would love to get started whenever! :)
Getting her email made me feel SO successful! I came up with this penpal idea all on my own and contacted people I knew all on my own and got them excited about it all on my own. Maybe I'm not bad at this teaching silliness? Maybe I'm kinda awesome and innovative at it at times? ^_^
I told my favorite teacher about my penpal project idea and she said that the head misteress had been begging her to do an exchange like that with the school she knew in Ireland, but that my favorite teacher just hadn't had the time nor energy to do so. I can't wait to tell that woman that I came up with it on my own and already have four schools and 300 kids interested!!!! ^_^ YAY ME!!!
While basking in the glow of my mini success, I wandered around Madrid before tango class and went window shopping, ate my pizza and looked at the Christmas decorations they're setting up. They're SO adorable!! They are making a little Christmas market in the big Plaza Mayor and there are little booths set up and a big, golden, glowing carrosel in the middle of it all!!! There are big Christmas trees all around the city and lights that will be hanging over all of the main streets (even my street in Alcala has lights that will be lit up in the shape of a bunch of grapes - grapes are a New Year's Eve symbol here - sorta odd... haha)! The lighting of the lights festival is on Friday night; I can't wait to see them all!!
Christmas in Europe is going to be SO QUAINT!
When I finally got to tango class, I was welcomed by the teachers as usual and told that since I missed a class this month, I was welcome to come to the intermediate class on Thursday to make it up.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was so excited I just about peed my pants!!
All class long I danced like nobody's business and kept thinking about what intermediate class would be like! In beginner class, I'm clearly the best female dancer there (just say'n) - as I have lots of dance experience and try to be conscious of my posture and footwork, all while following the lead (even when they mess up and I know it). I have two leads I love dancing with - Julio, who is perhaps in his 50's but a jolly man who's always giggling and has a very firm but comfortable lead, and Martin, who is quite possibly still in high school for all I know, but dances at an advanced level and is there to help out when there aren't enough leads (he might even be the teachers' son - I still haven't figured out the relationship there???). Anyway, Julio is a hoot and whenever I mess up and do something silly because there's no fixing the mistake once I've made it, he always says, "Oh! That mistake was virtually undetectable. You are just such a smooth dancer!" Hahaha. :) We're the only two in the class who get the giggles and it's awesome. Totally the way dancing should be, in my opinion. Martin, on the other hand, is very serious and extremely quiet. He has black curly hair and reminds me of my awkward dancer friends from Fond du Lac! He's my favorite to dance with because he can tell I can follow well and will lead me into so many steps I haven't been taught yet, but that I can (generally) follow without much of a problem. For that reason, dancing with him is exhiliarating. To always be on your toes and to never know what's coming or if you'll even be able to follow it - that's dancer bliss!
I still remember the very first time I ever felt dancer bliss. It was way back in the first semester of my Senior year in high school. I was in the ballroom dance class (I didn't want to take gym class - Woody suggested it as a clever way to get your P.E. credit - hell yes to Woody!), and we were studying swing (most likely Lindy Hop). One of the past students who was into the dance and good at it came in one day to dance with us to give us a feel for what it felt like to dance with a competent lead. I remember my turn with him and him just throwing me all around the room and doing crazy lifts and spinning me all around. The music was so fast and he was such a solid lead. It was AMAZING. I remember stumbling out of the dance room, panting, beelining for the water fountain and thinking to myself how much better that was than even the best of make-out sessions. :) Tee hee.
Anyway, tonight Martin went to ask me a question while we were dancing (which he never, ever does). I was so caught off guard by it and he is so mummbly when he speaks that I didn't understand a word of his question. What I did understand, though, were my answer choices: "No or More?"
"Eff," I thought to myself. "I'm just going to have to flip a coin in my head and pick an answer. Even if I ask him to repeat it, I know I won't understand any better the second time." I mulled over the two answers and what they might signify, and finally decided the question must have been something like, "Would you like me to keep working on the new step, or would you like me to do new steps?" He HAD been sticking to the new step - which was very unlike him - and I had started to wonder why he was being so boring tonight. I figured my logic must be right, given my two choices of a response, and answered, "More! Please more!"
He stopped and looked at me. "Really?!" he asked.
"Effff!!" my mind squealed.
He continued doing the super boring new step over and over until the teacher yelled, "Cambio de pareja!"
As I danced with the new partner (who was not very good so I had extra space in my head to think rather than to try to do any of the steps correctly!), I racked my brain for any of the words that had been in his question. WHAT HAD HE ASKED ME!? And then, all at once, it fell together. "Would you like me to continue to go over today's step more?"
God d&%# it!!! >_<
As soon as the teacher yelled, "Cambio de pareja!" again I ran back over to Martin. In slightly awkward Spanish I breathlessly explained myself: "I didn't understand your question right. That question you asked me while we were dancing. No - no I don't want you to go over today's step. No more of today's step. It's boring. Anything but today's step. I'm sorry - I swear I can speak and understand Spanish - just not when I'm here. Something about this room makes me totally awful at Spanish. I don't know why!!"
Martin just stared at me like I was nuts, thought about it for a second, and then gave a tiny smirk and danced with me, happily limiting himself on the use of today's step this go-around.
>_< Brother.
Nothin' like looking like a total American weirdo.
While we danced he asked where I was from - but he asked the question under his breath and mumbling - so AGAIN I didn't understand him. I just stared at him instead of trying to answer incorrectly again and he said, "Can you really not understand me? Where. Are. You. From."
Jeeze louise, dude. Ennunciate your words for a foreign girl focusing on not stepping on your toes. Man! ;)
Between hugs, kisses, compliments, private lessons, Mrs. Hinchey and tango, it was a pretty ducky Tuesday!
XOXO
O_O
You'd think after three months I wouldn't be "culturally shocked" by much any more, but having twenty 10 year olds kissing my face and hugging me real tight was definitely completely bewildering to me. I kept thinking, "This can't be legal. Is this okay?" before realizing what country I was in and how touchy-feely everyone is here all the time. :)
A few class periods later I was with my favorite teacher. She began to tell me how Mr. Nacho's mom (who is the language teacher to the kids in Primary) was telling her how much Nacho loves me and how much he's learning from me. ^_^ To have my favorite teacher in the whole school telling me a compliment she'd heard about me was amazing! :)
I have been noticing that Nacho and the other boy I tutor have been getting oddly really good at English as compared to the day I began with them a few months ago, but I figured it was probably just because of their English classes at school. But maybe I'm just selling myself short? I mean Nacho is in the same grade as the girl I tutor and he speaks a million times better than she does. I teach his class one hour a week at school and talk to those kids and he's way better than they are.
When his mom approached me about tutoring him, she said she just wanted me to come over for two hours a week to play with him and hang out - all in English. She wanted him to become comfortable with the language and not shy to use it. She didn't need me to teach him specific things or use any books - just to make it seem fun. Thsoe first few weeks he wouldn't say a single word. He was scared and uncomfortable. But after we broke through that phase, he's been amazing. He'll only speak English for the entire hour and he never really tries to switch into Spanish. He loves having me over and when he doesn't know a word he'll just stop and look at me and I'll whisper it to him.
Considering this little guy is only a 6 year old in 1st grade, I suppose I really should be giving myself a little credit for his love of speaking a language which only weeks ago he refused to utter a single word in. He always begs his mom to let me come over on other afternoons and begs me not to leave. He even asks if he can come to my tango lessons because he loves dancing with me. :)
Then there's the second grader who I tutor. We have to use books sometimes because of his parents, but the times he learns the most is when we're playing soccer or with his cars. I remember a few weeks ago when his dad asked him what his name was and he couldn't even answer him. Now, he can tell you all about himself, all about his favorite mammals, amphibians, insects, birds, foods, etc. He knows more about viviparous and non-viviparous animals than I do (I didn't even KNOW that word before he taught it to me!).
As for his sister, I've taken to helping her with little craft projects and cutting things out and coloring things for it. But each time I cut or color, I have her answer a question in English about herself. This is how I started things out with her brother. Now when I go to cut she yells, "First - one question!!" It's really interesting to see how when she says something wrong and I repeat it back to her with corrections (but not "correcting her," rather just nodding my head and re-stating what she said correctly with excitement), it only takes me two or three times of doing this and suddenly she never makes that mistake again:
"What color is your dress?"
"My color dress is blue."
"Oh! Your dress is blue! What color is your skirt?"
"My color dress is red."
"Oh! Your dress is red! What color is your shirt?"
"My shirt is pink."
O_O
It's way impressive to listen to. Freak'n little kids!
I also started playing "foot phone" with her on accident this last lesson and she LOVED it. It's a thing Julia and I have done for forever when we're being silly - I never considered it as a way to teach English! Haha. She was laying on the floor and put her foot in the air so I grabbed it and said, "Hello!?" She immediately answered, "Hello!" It continued into a full conversation - all in English! The FIRST TIME she has spoken all in English. She thought it was so fun she kept "calling" me on her foot phone and doing the same conversation over and over - only she started asking ME the questions. It was way strange, but a delightful epiphany. :) Haha.
Anyway, on the way back to Nacho's house this afternoon for his "lesson," his mom put on a CD and Nacho started singing "You've Got a Friend in Me" from Toy Story! It was ADORABLE to hear him singing it - haha! Each class has to do their own song and dance in costume for the Christmas festival on the 21st of December, and that's the song his class is doing! I wish Woody could be there for it - haha! :)
After Nacho's class it was off to Madrid for Tango Tuesday. While on the train into the city, I got an email back from Mrs. Hinchey - my Spanish teacher from middle school!! She wrote me that my Spanish was AMAZING and that she would LOVE to have her 7th and 8th graders to become penpals with my students!!! ^_^ YAY!!! She has 130 students that could participate and would love to get started whenever! :)
Getting her email made me feel SO successful! I came up with this penpal idea all on my own and contacted people I knew all on my own and got them excited about it all on my own. Maybe I'm not bad at this teaching silliness? Maybe I'm kinda awesome and innovative at it at times? ^_^
I told my favorite teacher about my penpal project idea and she said that the head misteress had been begging her to do an exchange like that with the school she knew in Ireland, but that my favorite teacher just hadn't had the time nor energy to do so. I can't wait to tell that woman that I came up with it on my own and already have four schools and 300 kids interested!!!! ^_^ YAY ME!!!
While basking in the glow of my mini success, I wandered around Madrid before tango class and went window shopping, ate my pizza and looked at the Christmas decorations they're setting up. They're SO adorable!! They are making a little Christmas market in the big Plaza Mayor and there are little booths set up and a big, golden, glowing carrosel in the middle of it all!!! There are big Christmas trees all around the city and lights that will be hanging over all of the main streets (even my street in Alcala has lights that will be lit up in the shape of a bunch of grapes - grapes are a New Year's Eve symbol here - sorta odd... haha)! The lighting of the lights festival is on Friday night; I can't wait to see them all!!
Christmas in Europe is going to be SO QUAINT!
When I finally got to tango class, I was welcomed by the teachers as usual and told that since I missed a class this month, I was welcome to come to the intermediate class on Thursday to make it up.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was so excited I just about peed my pants!!
All class long I danced like nobody's business and kept thinking about what intermediate class would be like! In beginner class, I'm clearly the best female dancer there (just say'n) - as I have lots of dance experience and try to be conscious of my posture and footwork, all while following the lead (even when they mess up and I know it). I have two leads I love dancing with - Julio, who is perhaps in his 50's but a jolly man who's always giggling and has a very firm but comfortable lead, and Martin, who is quite possibly still in high school for all I know, but dances at an advanced level and is there to help out when there aren't enough leads (he might even be the teachers' son - I still haven't figured out the relationship there???). Anyway, Julio is a hoot and whenever I mess up and do something silly because there's no fixing the mistake once I've made it, he always says, "Oh! That mistake was virtually undetectable. You are just such a smooth dancer!" Hahaha. :) We're the only two in the class who get the giggles and it's awesome. Totally the way dancing should be, in my opinion. Martin, on the other hand, is very serious and extremely quiet. He has black curly hair and reminds me of my awkward dancer friends from Fond du Lac! He's my favorite to dance with because he can tell I can follow well and will lead me into so many steps I haven't been taught yet, but that I can (generally) follow without much of a problem. For that reason, dancing with him is exhiliarating. To always be on your toes and to never know what's coming or if you'll even be able to follow it - that's dancer bliss!
I still remember the very first time I ever felt dancer bliss. It was way back in the first semester of my Senior year in high school. I was in the ballroom dance class (I didn't want to take gym class - Woody suggested it as a clever way to get your P.E. credit - hell yes to Woody!), and we were studying swing (most likely Lindy Hop). One of the past students who was into the dance and good at it came in one day to dance with us to give us a feel for what it felt like to dance with a competent lead. I remember my turn with him and him just throwing me all around the room and doing crazy lifts and spinning me all around. The music was so fast and he was such a solid lead. It was AMAZING. I remember stumbling out of the dance room, panting, beelining for the water fountain and thinking to myself how much better that was than even the best of make-out sessions. :) Tee hee.
Anyway, tonight Martin went to ask me a question while we were dancing (which he never, ever does). I was so caught off guard by it and he is so mummbly when he speaks that I didn't understand a word of his question. What I did understand, though, were my answer choices: "No or More?"
"Eff," I thought to myself. "I'm just going to have to flip a coin in my head and pick an answer. Even if I ask him to repeat it, I know I won't understand any better the second time." I mulled over the two answers and what they might signify, and finally decided the question must have been something like, "Would you like me to keep working on the new step, or would you like me to do new steps?" He HAD been sticking to the new step - which was very unlike him - and I had started to wonder why he was being so boring tonight. I figured my logic must be right, given my two choices of a response, and answered, "More! Please more!"
He stopped and looked at me. "Really?!" he asked.
"Effff!!" my mind squealed.
He continued doing the super boring new step over and over until the teacher yelled, "Cambio de pareja!"
As I danced with the new partner (who was not very good so I had extra space in my head to think rather than to try to do any of the steps correctly!), I racked my brain for any of the words that had been in his question. WHAT HAD HE ASKED ME!? And then, all at once, it fell together. "Would you like me to continue to go over today's step more?"
God d&%# it!!! >_<
As soon as the teacher yelled, "Cambio de pareja!" again I ran back over to Martin. In slightly awkward Spanish I breathlessly explained myself: "I didn't understand your question right. That question you asked me while we were dancing. No - no I don't want you to go over today's step. No more of today's step. It's boring. Anything but today's step. I'm sorry - I swear I can speak and understand Spanish - just not when I'm here. Something about this room makes me totally awful at Spanish. I don't know why!!"
Martin just stared at me like I was nuts, thought about it for a second, and then gave a tiny smirk and danced with me, happily limiting himself on the use of today's step this go-around.
>_< Brother.
Nothin' like looking like a total American weirdo.
While we danced he asked where I was from - but he asked the question under his breath and mumbling - so AGAIN I didn't understand him. I just stared at him instead of trying to answer incorrectly again and he said, "Can you really not understand me? Where. Are. You. From."
Jeeze louise, dude. Ennunciate your words for a foreign girl focusing on not stepping on your toes. Man! ;)
Between hugs, kisses, compliments, private lessons, Mrs. Hinchey and tango, it was a pretty ducky Tuesday!
XOXO
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Day 85: Reflection / Philosophy
It's been a fair few days since I wrote a reflection blog, and it's been building up in there for some time. I finally got my second edition of "When Everything Changes, Change Everything" from Amazon.com - England last week and I reread through the whole thing in a matter of days, rehighlighting and writing notes in the margins. I had finally started to feel like I was finding myself when it arrived in the mail - perfect timing! ;)
I've watched "The Secret" since I was in high school. I've read the books. I've tried to follow the philosophies (when I'm emotionally lucid enough to do so). But between living my dream life in Europe, the huge change in all things important to me in America, my "personal bible" and Pinterest (yes, Pinterest)... something's starting to click that I've never seen or even considered before.
Yeah, I always understood the fundamental concept of positive thinking and visualization, etc. It made sense to me. For the most part, it worked for me (not always as quickly as I wanted it to!). But when I'd finally get what I'd been focusing so much time and energy on, I'd always end up feeling even more empty than I had when I had been desiring it. And I could never, ever figure out why. For years I thought it was just because I was so scared of losing what I'd worked so hard to get. But that wasn't exactly it...
There's this quote on Pinterest that I run across quite frequently:
"You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."
At first, I didn't quite grasp the meaning. I thought I was dreaming big. But after reading it and rereading it, I started to think to myself, "How could I make what I'm dreaming more grandiose? What would that look like?
And I started to realize a step beyond what I wanted seemed totally too far-fetched. Like my head was truly in the clouds and I was being irrational. Which is when it hit me - my dreams weren't scaring me... they weren't crazy awesome things with which I was so passionate about I could just burst.
See, my dreams had always been people (and, occationally, places). I wanted to be in a relationship with THIS ONE person. I wanted to live in THIS ONE city. And that was what I wanted. When I got what I wanted, I was happy but would often feel empty.
And I began to realize that this is just how people "dream." They take the one thing they want that's just out of their grasp (perhaps for a very good reason sometimes!) and they decide that's what they want. Just that. They want that one person or that next raise or that new product, etc. That's where all their (and mine) dreams and aspirations lie.
But what if with just a little more effort and concentration (and exponential more passion!) you could get ANYTHING in the whole universe (and even perhaps some things that don't even yet exist in the universe). Anything. Not just that next raise - but a whole new job in paradise that you were absolutely in love with and made bank? Not just that one person - but somebody amazing and exotic and adoring of you? Not just that new product - but an experience that far outshines some material possession?
I don't think people think like that. I never did until a few weeks ago when I started working on my "Life Catalog." I made myself write down the top three things I would want if life had a catalog of experiences, people, things, etc. and I could just order anything I desired - no matter how farfetched or grandiose or crazy or amazing.
Admittedly, at first it was really tricky. My mind wasn't used to thinking that big. To thinking that far out of the box. My mind was accustomed (very accustomed - conditionally trained for the past 23 years) to think of what it thought it had a very real chance of getting and accomplishing. But after a lot of meditating and thinking and feeling and exploring and Pinteresting... it started to come to me.
I didn't just want to live in Europe... I want to live on a far of gorgeous tropic island paradise and spend my days sunkissed and blissful- and that'll just be one of many places I call home.
I didn't just want a new, cute sweater... I want a custom made Vespa with custom Louis Vuitton luggage.
I didn't just want a job teaching English... I want to be one of the highest paid language consultants in the world, working at high class resorts with the creme de le creme of clients. I want to be the best one there is on the whole planet and have waiting lists filled with politicians, celebrities, etc.
I didn't just want to have somebody who I can enjoy a good meal and a cuddle with... I want somebody who worships and adores me... who makes me feel like a princess they carry around in their pocket and sends me a bouquet of cupcakes to my work with a plane ticket underneath them to a jet-set weekend adventure just because they adore me and love to travel with me and make me feel like the most important and lucky girl in the world. Somebody who would fight for me no matter what - 'til the death... just to be able to hold my hand. Somebody who I would do the exact same thing for - no hestitation, no questions.
The more I thought about it, the more vivid and awe-inspiring they became. Everytime I drifted off into a day dream I would become wanderstruck and be carried to a far off land of pure happiness and bliss.
And then it hit me: Why not?
Why spend my time trying to get a job I'm not passionate about? Why spend my money on something I'm not totally enchanted by? Why spend my energy pining for somebody who doesn't totally adore me and who isn't willing to fight for me even when things aren't terribly tough?
No - I'm not that girl. That's not who I was born to be. That's not who my parents raised me to be. That's not who my teachers inspired me to become.
I'm different.
I spend time just pondering. Trying to figure out the secrets to life that most other people have never even dreamed existed. I spend time reflecting and reading and studying and meditating. So much time. In fact, I started reading the meditation chapter in my book and was shocked that the things I do daily are considered to be high forms of meditation. Walking meditation. Focusing meditation. Shower meditation. Even (especially) writing meditation! All things involving pure focus, positive energy and curiosity. And here I thought it just meant a complete emptying of the mind! Not always - not by a long shot. No matter meditation is so preached about!
At first I asked myself, if something like this were truly possible, wouldn't everyone have figured it out and done it? But after careful thinking, I realized no, not at all. It's something that takes extreme faith in yourself and the universe. It's something that takes an adventurous, sanguine spirit. It's something that takes a huge risk and extreme openness. And it's something that takes daily work.
My book talks about how positive energy only really starts to work when it's not just an experiment you're doing, but when you start to truly believe what you're invisioning and working towards. This week, I started to reach that level. There is no longer any part of me that doubts that I can do anything I want, live wherever I want, find the perfect, dream job, meet the most amazing and adoring people... after weeks of focusing on nothing but this, it no longer seems like an outlandish daydream - it's just where I'm headed.
Sometimes I forget Conor there is to help guide the way. But more often than that, I forget the philosophy I came up with in high school - the one where I began to believe that our lives were written out by our very selves before we ever got to this planet. We had a magical pen and sheet of paper and we wrote everything on there we wanted to experience, everyone we wanted to meet and be in a relationship with, etc. And I know I'm an extrodinarily creative writer when I put my mind to it. ;)
Nothing has been boring so far in my life, and I know that nothing will ever be. Sometimes I just have to open myself up to what I wrote and have faith in myself that I knew what I was doing when I wrote it all out and that "[I] haven't missed it - it's all ahead of [me] - and [I] know what to do" (lyrics from a Sheryl Crow song - haha).
And so it is with great moxie, sanguinity and tenacity (my three favorite qualities and words!!) that every molecule of my being embraces this new philosophy. If this is how far I've come with just knowing half of "The Secret," imagine where I could go, who I could be, what I could accomplish and who I could meet now that I've had a glimpse at this other half.
I've never wanted to be the "normal" girl, nor have I EVER been the "normal" girl. I won't be the girl who marries somebody because it's the "right time." I won't be the girl who settles for a cookie cutter "adult" job just because she's of "adult" age. I won't be the girl who lives somewhere or does or is with somebody because it is "comfortable." Another Pinterest quote says: "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all." And: "Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone."
In my experience, these two sentiments are unequivocally true.
I've always been so very drawn to the lyrics in Ani's song "Alla This" where she sings, "I will maintain the truth I knew naturally as a child. I won't forfeit my creativity to a world that's all laid out for me. I'll look at everything around me, and I will vow to bear in mind that alla this was just someone's idea, it could just as well be mine."
Her lyrics always rang so true for me, and yet I never quite knew how to realistically relate them to my life. For the first time, I'm starting to see how... and it's comforting to know that there are others that feel this way and have used this belief to create a life they passionately adore.
And so I will keep my amazing adventure up here in Spain and I will use every ounce of my free time to keep meditating on exactly what I want my life to look like and figure out how to make it happen. I will continue to be grateful for everything I have and everything that brought me to where I am. I will continue to cultivate the amazing relationships I am blessed with in my life and I will continue to take time to read my book. I will continue to just breathe and just be, feeling myself transport itself to wherever I'm next meant to be according to my inner, creative and awe-inspiring and fearless self. She's always trusted me, but now I'm starting to give up a bit of my ego at a time and be all in, right there with her. <3
XOXO
I've watched "The Secret" since I was in high school. I've read the books. I've tried to follow the philosophies (when I'm emotionally lucid enough to do so). But between living my dream life in Europe, the huge change in all things important to me in America, my "personal bible" and Pinterest (yes, Pinterest)... something's starting to click that I've never seen or even considered before.
Yeah, I always understood the fundamental concept of positive thinking and visualization, etc. It made sense to me. For the most part, it worked for me (not always as quickly as I wanted it to!). But when I'd finally get what I'd been focusing so much time and energy on, I'd always end up feeling even more empty than I had when I had been desiring it. And I could never, ever figure out why. For years I thought it was just because I was so scared of losing what I'd worked so hard to get. But that wasn't exactly it...
There's this quote on Pinterest that I run across quite frequently:
"You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."
At first, I didn't quite grasp the meaning. I thought I was dreaming big. But after reading it and rereading it, I started to think to myself, "How could I make what I'm dreaming more grandiose? What would that look like?
And I started to realize a step beyond what I wanted seemed totally too far-fetched. Like my head was truly in the clouds and I was being irrational. Which is when it hit me - my dreams weren't scaring me... they weren't crazy awesome things with which I was so passionate about I could just burst.
See, my dreams had always been people (and, occationally, places). I wanted to be in a relationship with THIS ONE person. I wanted to live in THIS ONE city. And that was what I wanted. When I got what I wanted, I was happy but would often feel empty.
And I began to realize that this is just how people "dream." They take the one thing they want that's just out of their grasp (perhaps for a very good reason sometimes!) and they decide that's what they want. Just that. They want that one person or that next raise or that new product, etc. That's where all their (and mine) dreams and aspirations lie.
But what if with just a little more effort and concentration (and exponential more passion!) you could get ANYTHING in the whole universe (and even perhaps some things that don't even yet exist in the universe). Anything. Not just that next raise - but a whole new job in paradise that you were absolutely in love with and made bank? Not just that one person - but somebody amazing and exotic and adoring of you? Not just that new product - but an experience that far outshines some material possession?
I don't think people think like that. I never did until a few weeks ago when I started working on my "Life Catalog." I made myself write down the top three things I would want if life had a catalog of experiences, people, things, etc. and I could just order anything I desired - no matter how farfetched or grandiose or crazy or amazing.
Admittedly, at first it was really tricky. My mind wasn't used to thinking that big. To thinking that far out of the box. My mind was accustomed (very accustomed - conditionally trained for the past 23 years) to think of what it thought it had a very real chance of getting and accomplishing. But after a lot of meditating and thinking and feeling and exploring and Pinteresting... it started to come to me.
I didn't just want to live in Europe... I want to live on a far of gorgeous tropic island paradise and spend my days sunkissed and blissful- and that'll just be one of many places I call home.
I didn't just want a new, cute sweater... I want a custom made Vespa with custom Louis Vuitton luggage.
I didn't just want a job teaching English... I want to be one of the highest paid language consultants in the world, working at high class resorts with the creme de le creme of clients. I want to be the best one there is on the whole planet and have waiting lists filled with politicians, celebrities, etc.
I didn't just want to have somebody who I can enjoy a good meal and a cuddle with... I want somebody who worships and adores me... who makes me feel like a princess they carry around in their pocket and sends me a bouquet of cupcakes to my work with a plane ticket underneath them to a jet-set weekend adventure just because they adore me and love to travel with me and make me feel like the most important and lucky girl in the world. Somebody who would fight for me no matter what - 'til the death... just to be able to hold my hand. Somebody who I would do the exact same thing for - no hestitation, no questions.
The more I thought about it, the more vivid and awe-inspiring they became. Everytime I drifted off into a day dream I would become wanderstruck and be carried to a far off land of pure happiness and bliss.
And then it hit me: Why not?
Why spend my time trying to get a job I'm not passionate about? Why spend my money on something I'm not totally enchanted by? Why spend my energy pining for somebody who doesn't totally adore me and who isn't willing to fight for me even when things aren't terribly tough?
No - I'm not that girl. That's not who I was born to be. That's not who my parents raised me to be. That's not who my teachers inspired me to become.
I'm different.
I spend time just pondering. Trying to figure out the secrets to life that most other people have never even dreamed existed. I spend time reflecting and reading and studying and meditating. So much time. In fact, I started reading the meditation chapter in my book and was shocked that the things I do daily are considered to be high forms of meditation. Walking meditation. Focusing meditation. Shower meditation. Even (especially) writing meditation! All things involving pure focus, positive energy and curiosity. And here I thought it just meant a complete emptying of the mind! Not always - not by a long shot. No matter meditation is so preached about!
At first I asked myself, if something like this were truly possible, wouldn't everyone have figured it out and done it? But after careful thinking, I realized no, not at all. It's something that takes extreme faith in yourself and the universe. It's something that takes an adventurous, sanguine spirit. It's something that takes a huge risk and extreme openness. And it's something that takes daily work.
My book talks about how positive energy only really starts to work when it's not just an experiment you're doing, but when you start to truly believe what you're invisioning and working towards. This week, I started to reach that level. There is no longer any part of me that doubts that I can do anything I want, live wherever I want, find the perfect, dream job, meet the most amazing and adoring people... after weeks of focusing on nothing but this, it no longer seems like an outlandish daydream - it's just where I'm headed.
Sometimes I forget Conor there is to help guide the way. But more often than that, I forget the philosophy I came up with in high school - the one where I began to believe that our lives were written out by our very selves before we ever got to this planet. We had a magical pen and sheet of paper and we wrote everything on there we wanted to experience, everyone we wanted to meet and be in a relationship with, etc. And I know I'm an extrodinarily creative writer when I put my mind to it. ;)
Nothing has been boring so far in my life, and I know that nothing will ever be. Sometimes I just have to open myself up to what I wrote and have faith in myself that I knew what I was doing when I wrote it all out and that "[I] haven't missed it - it's all ahead of [me] - and [I] know what to do" (lyrics from a Sheryl Crow song - haha).
And so it is with great moxie, sanguinity and tenacity (my three favorite qualities and words!!) that every molecule of my being embraces this new philosophy. If this is how far I've come with just knowing half of "The Secret," imagine where I could go, who I could be, what I could accomplish and who I could meet now that I've had a glimpse at this other half.
I've never wanted to be the "normal" girl, nor have I EVER been the "normal" girl. I won't be the girl who marries somebody because it's the "right time." I won't be the girl who settles for a cookie cutter "adult" job just because she's of "adult" age. I won't be the girl who lives somewhere or does or is with somebody because it is "comfortable." Another Pinterest quote says: "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all." And: "Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone."
In my experience, these two sentiments are unequivocally true.
I've always been so very drawn to the lyrics in Ani's song "Alla This" where she sings, "I will maintain the truth I knew naturally as a child. I won't forfeit my creativity to a world that's all laid out for me. I'll look at everything around me, and I will vow to bear in mind that alla this was just someone's idea, it could just as well be mine."
Her lyrics always rang so true for me, and yet I never quite knew how to realistically relate them to my life. For the first time, I'm starting to see how... and it's comforting to know that there are others that feel this way and have used this belief to create a life they passionately adore.
And so I will keep my amazing adventure up here in Spain and I will use every ounce of my free time to keep meditating on exactly what I want my life to look like and figure out how to make it happen. I will continue to be grateful for everything I have and everything that brought me to where I am. I will continue to cultivate the amazing relationships I am blessed with in my life and I will continue to take time to read my book. I will continue to just breathe and just be, feeling myself transport itself to wherever I'm next meant to be according to my inner, creative and awe-inspiring and fearless self. She's always trusted me, but now I'm starting to give up a bit of my ego at a time and be all in, right there with her. <3
XOXO
Monday, November 26, 2012
Days 83/84: Frenchie
The only time I left the apartment this weekend was late Saturday afternoon when my Spanish family took Jen, her friend and I to the factorias (outlet mall). I got a cute cardigan. :) Other than that brief outing, I primarily stayed cozied up in bed and on my laptop. :)
I began research for my Epic European Escape and found three people between London and Dublin to stay with on Couch Surfing! I started looking for jobs for next July. I did a little Pinteresting. I did some Facebooking.
In fact the only crazy thing that happened was this afternoon when I got into a confrontation with one of the Spanish roommates about how she is ALWAYS using the wash machine and how it's ridiculous. She literally uses it every other day (at least), all day long. It's incomprehensible. Between ourselves, my roomie friends and I complain, but no matter what hints we throw at her, she just keeps doing it. We made a sign up sheet last week so each person could have their own day, but she signed up for three days, and then still did it every day!!!
This afternoon was Abby's turn. At noon Frenchie already had her clothes going. Three and a half hours later, they were STILL IN THE MACHINE on the dry cycle. Abby was getting beyond frustrated and I was amused and ticked off at the same thing. The audacity! But when she went to set the cycle for another hour I was done. So done.
Abby begged me not to make a scene but I knocked and burst through their door and proceeded to have a ten minute argument with her - all in Spanish (I must say I'm totally impressed - my first Spanish argument went really well) - about how it was over. She had to stop being so ridiculous with her obsessive need to wash her clothes all day, every day. She kept saying she didn't have any and had to wash them because French people can't wear jeans or ANYTHING more than once without first washing it. I told her between Wednesday sign up and Saturday sign up, all she needed was four pairs of pants and four shirts, and I think she would manage. UGH.
Anyway, it ended with her marching out to the machine and taking all of her clothes out of it. WIN. My roomies were all pretending to be working on their laptops, but as soon as the Frenchie went back to her room in a huff, they all called me into Katies room and cheered for me! ^_^
YAY!!!
XOXO
I began research for my Epic European Escape and found three people between London and Dublin to stay with on Couch Surfing! I started looking for jobs for next July. I did a little Pinteresting. I did some Facebooking.
In fact the only crazy thing that happened was this afternoon when I got into a confrontation with one of the Spanish roommates about how she is ALWAYS using the wash machine and how it's ridiculous. She literally uses it every other day (at least), all day long. It's incomprehensible. Between ourselves, my roomie friends and I complain, but no matter what hints we throw at her, she just keeps doing it. We made a sign up sheet last week so each person could have their own day, but she signed up for three days, and then still did it every day!!!
This afternoon was Abby's turn. At noon Frenchie already had her clothes going. Three and a half hours later, they were STILL IN THE MACHINE on the dry cycle. Abby was getting beyond frustrated and I was amused and ticked off at the same thing. The audacity! But when she went to set the cycle for another hour I was done. So done.
Abby begged me not to make a scene but I knocked and burst through their door and proceeded to have a ten minute argument with her - all in Spanish (I must say I'm totally impressed - my first Spanish argument went really well) - about how it was over. She had to stop being so ridiculous with her obsessive need to wash her clothes all day, every day. She kept saying she didn't have any and had to wash them because French people can't wear jeans or ANYTHING more than once without first washing it. I told her between Wednesday sign up and Saturday sign up, all she needed was four pairs of pants and four shirts, and I think she would manage. UGH.
Anyway, it ended with her marching out to the machine and taking all of her clothes out of it. WIN. My roomies were all pretending to be working on their laptops, but as soon as the Frenchie went back to her room in a huff, they all called me into Katies room and cheered for me! ^_^
YAY!!!
XOXO
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Day 82: Thanksgiving Dinner!
Thanksgiving Dinner was the hugest success!!! I started making my potatoes in the early afternoon and ended up making way too many - but they were still yummy!!! We had 20 people come and they all brought food. Ali and I tried our hand at making two whole chickens, Abby made stuffing, Katie made pumpkin and apple pies, Marianna made Italian zucchini parmesan and tiramisu. Other people brought lots more goodies and TONS of wine (we still have five bottles - yay!).
I was a little nervous right before the party began - a nervous pre-party feeling I hadn't felt since perhaps right before my awesome 16th birthday party, but a feeling that I absolutely LOVE!! Part of my nerves was about my Spanish family coming. I wanted them to have a good time and meet everyone. I was so happy when my Spanish family arrived and they were so adorable!! They ate and ate and loved the food! They stayed and chatted and giggled until after midnight. It was so cool to be able to invite THEM to something that was from MY culture for a change. My roomies loved my Spanish fam and my Spanish mom said all my roomies were "GORGEOUS!" :oP
Below are pictures from the night! ^_^
I was a little nervous right before the party began - a nervous pre-party feeling I hadn't felt since perhaps right before my awesome 16th birthday party, but a feeling that I absolutely LOVE!! Part of my nerves was about my Spanish family coming. I wanted them to have a good time and meet everyone. I was so happy when my Spanish family arrived and they were so adorable!! They ate and ate and loved the food! They stayed and chatted and giggled until after midnight. It was so cool to be able to invite THEM to something that was from MY culture for a change. My roomies loved my Spanish fam and my Spanish mom said all my roomies were "GORGEOUS!" :oP
Below are pictures from the night! ^_^
Jen (current American student staying with my Spanish fam), Cruz and I posing ^_^
Jen's cute Oreo Turkeys :)
Chelly & Abby Chelly & Katie
Ali & Chelly The Five Awesomest Roomies!
So much food!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Roomies chilling out after the big party :)
Day 81: Thanksgiving
I had no private lessons after school, so I got to come straight home for the first time in weeks and weeks! It was amazing to walk in the door before 5pm and have all my roomies gathered in the kitchen, chatting and giggling. :oD They were all shocked and so happy I was home so early and quickly included me in their after-school huddle. Ali told us a funny story about our strange roommate and I couldn't help but laugh until I almost peed my pants!! :) I love coming home to those three!!! We spent the rest of the night on Pinterest, chatting and cooking a little bit to prepare for the big feast on Friday. I got to have an adorable txt convo with J too, while asking her for her amazing cheesy garlic mashed potato recipe. :) Yay! All in all, it was a very relaxing, fun night at home, indeed!
So, although our Thanksgiving dinner will be tomorrow and not today, in honor of it being Thanksgiving day, I'd like to write what I'm most thankful for this year. ^_^
1) I'm thankful for my wonderful roomies - more on them to follow. ;)
2) I'm thankful for having the opportunity to live in Madrid, Spain - I just adore the city!
3) I'm thankful for being assigned to such a lovely school and the teachers and students there and the freedom I have working there.
4) I'm thankful for my cute apartment!
5) I'm thankful for the select yummy food Spain has - like gazpacho, salmon tostas, horchata, etc. :)
6) I'm thankful for Tango class and how happy it makes me every single Tuesday.
7) I'm thankful for my blog and having it as something that can document my travels and help me to reflect on them, all while sharing my experiences with those closest to me.
8) I'm thankful for the cute new wardrobe I'm creating. ;)
9) I'm thankful for my sanguinity, tenacity and uniqueness - and for all the work I've done and growth I've experienced since arriving in Spain.
10) I'm thankful for those certain people I love and adore in America who keep in touch with me and support me, even when I'm far away for long periods of time.
<3
And now, for a little more explanation of the first (just 'cause I'm feeling especially grateful for them and have been meaning to write a whole blog about them for awhile). I'm super thankful for my wonderful roomies. I absolutely ADORE them and can't imagine what my life here would have been like without them. I'd dreamed about being a part of a group of four friends ever since I was in middle school. When I was a little older and began to watch Sex & the City, I was always so envious of the friendship those four women had together. Everybody had their very definite spot in the group and nobody was ever forgotten or left out. They all adored each other and they all were equally important. I used to draw being a part of something like that. I would try to imagine what that will feel like - being adored for me, having a group of close friends, not being forgotten or left behind. I had no idea what that would feel like, but I hoped more than anything one day I would find out.
And here I am! I absolutely ADORE these three girls and I feel so lucky and grateful to be a part of this crazy little group. I feel loved by all three of them and feel completely supported, too. I know that if I have a bad day, I can come home and complain and they'll all be there to listen and make me giggle and make me some yummy food to cheer me up. I know that they're always on my side and that they think I'm unique and wonderful just the way I am. I feel like not only do I fit in to this group, but that I'm just as important to the group as each of the other girls is. I have my place and it's very defined and I'm not replaceable nor forgettable!
This is the first time in my life I've ever felt like this, and I adore every second of it. Before moving in with these girls and cultivating our friendships, I always thought the only way to feel comfortable and supported and loved was through a romantic relationship. The epiphany that this isn't the case at all is completely shocking! Suddenly I see why people join sororities and live together in a big house. Suddenly I see what all those quotes about friends being so central to a happy life mean. Suddenly I see why I would feel so lonely sometimes in the romantic relationships that meant the most to me. Suddenly I see what I've been missing and craving - and I'm sooooo very grateful I've found it here in Madrid with these three wonderful girls! <3
Perhaps the best thing they've done for me in these three short months has been how they've helped me to change my perspective on how I see myself. When I tell them that I've always thought I was an awkward, anti-social, unlikeable person, they laugh. They say that I'm very outgoing once I get comfortable and that I'm super chill and sweet. Katie was telling me how Abby says I'm a lovely roomie because I always try to be quiet and respectful, and as soon as I think I've done something to bother her even the slightest bit, I'll buy her one of her favorite candies and write her a mini apology note and put it on her desk for when she wakes up. They point out how I listen and how I go with the flow of whatever is going on. They point out of adventurous I am and how good of a teacher I am. They point out how I deserve better than I think I do and how I judge myself far too harshly than I should. They point out how crazy and wonderful my life as been so far and how I am always doing things to make sure it continues to be awesome no matter what.
To have three girls who I very much adore and respect living with me 24/7 (well, minus work time and Tango Tuesdays) and still have all of these wonderful things to say about me makes me feel inexplicably warm and fuzzy inside. I have lived my life for two decades thinking I was intrinsically awkward and unlikeable... like I would never fit in and like there was something just wrong with me... like I wasn't as successful in life as I should be and like if I really had anything crazy superb in me then the one person I love more than anyone wouldn't always go off for periods of time. But every single one of these negative, preconceived notions I've held about myself for all of these many years are being chiseled away by these three girls and I can't begin to express how much lighter and more in love with myself and the world they've helped me to feel. <3 Truly.
I just love coming home to friends and knowing that I can flop in any of their beds at any time and watch a show or listen to music or talk about our day or make them a cake and giggle over stories or go out or just be. <3
So if any of you are reading this, a huge, colorful and sincere THANK YOU Abby, Katie and Ali. <3
XOXO
So, although our Thanksgiving dinner will be tomorrow and not today, in honor of it being Thanksgiving day, I'd like to write what I'm most thankful for this year. ^_^
1) I'm thankful for my wonderful roomies - more on them to follow. ;)
2) I'm thankful for having the opportunity to live in Madrid, Spain - I just adore the city!
3) I'm thankful for being assigned to such a lovely school and the teachers and students there and the freedom I have working there.
4) I'm thankful for my cute apartment!
5) I'm thankful for the select yummy food Spain has - like gazpacho, salmon tostas, horchata, etc. :)
6) I'm thankful for Tango class and how happy it makes me every single Tuesday.
7) I'm thankful for my blog and having it as something that can document my travels and help me to reflect on them, all while sharing my experiences with those closest to me.
8) I'm thankful for the cute new wardrobe I'm creating. ;)
9) I'm thankful for my sanguinity, tenacity and uniqueness - and for all the work I've done and growth I've experienced since arriving in Spain.
10) I'm thankful for those certain people I love and adore in America who keep in touch with me and support me, even when I'm far away for long periods of time.
<3
And now, for a little more explanation of the first (just 'cause I'm feeling especially grateful for them and have been meaning to write a whole blog about them for awhile). I'm super thankful for my wonderful roomies. I absolutely ADORE them and can't imagine what my life here would have been like without them. I'd dreamed about being a part of a group of four friends ever since I was in middle school. When I was a little older and began to watch Sex & the City, I was always so envious of the friendship those four women had together. Everybody had their very definite spot in the group and nobody was ever forgotten or left out. They all adored each other and they all were equally important. I used to draw being a part of something like that. I would try to imagine what that will feel like - being adored for me, having a group of close friends, not being forgotten or left behind. I had no idea what that would feel like, but I hoped more than anything one day I would find out.
And here I am! I absolutely ADORE these three girls and I feel so lucky and grateful to be a part of this crazy little group. I feel loved by all three of them and feel completely supported, too. I know that if I have a bad day, I can come home and complain and they'll all be there to listen and make me giggle and make me some yummy food to cheer me up. I know that they're always on my side and that they think I'm unique and wonderful just the way I am. I feel like not only do I fit in to this group, but that I'm just as important to the group as each of the other girls is. I have my place and it's very defined and I'm not replaceable nor forgettable!
This is the first time in my life I've ever felt like this, and I adore every second of it. Before moving in with these girls and cultivating our friendships, I always thought the only way to feel comfortable and supported and loved was through a romantic relationship. The epiphany that this isn't the case at all is completely shocking! Suddenly I see why people join sororities and live together in a big house. Suddenly I see what all those quotes about friends being so central to a happy life mean. Suddenly I see why I would feel so lonely sometimes in the romantic relationships that meant the most to me. Suddenly I see what I've been missing and craving - and I'm sooooo very grateful I've found it here in Madrid with these three wonderful girls! <3
Perhaps the best thing they've done for me in these three short months has been how they've helped me to change my perspective on how I see myself. When I tell them that I've always thought I was an awkward, anti-social, unlikeable person, they laugh. They say that I'm very outgoing once I get comfortable and that I'm super chill and sweet. Katie was telling me how Abby says I'm a lovely roomie because I always try to be quiet and respectful, and as soon as I think I've done something to bother her even the slightest bit, I'll buy her one of her favorite candies and write her a mini apology note and put it on her desk for when she wakes up. They point out how I listen and how I go with the flow of whatever is going on. They point out of adventurous I am and how good of a teacher I am. They point out how I deserve better than I think I do and how I judge myself far too harshly than I should. They point out how crazy and wonderful my life as been so far and how I am always doing things to make sure it continues to be awesome no matter what.
To have three girls who I very much adore and respect living with me 24/7 (well, minus work time and Tango Tuesdays) and still have all of these wonderful things to say about me makes me feel inexplicably warm and fuzzy inside. I have lived my life for two decades thinking I was intrinsically awkward and unlikeable... like I would never fit in and like there was something just wrong with me... like I wasn't as successful in life as I should be and like if I really had anything crazy superb in me then the one person I love more than anyone wouldn't always go off for periods of time. But every single one of these negative, preconceived notions I've held about myself for all of these many years are being chiseled away by these three girls and I can't begin to express how much lighter and more in love with myself and the world they've helped me to feel. <3 Truly.
I just love coming home to friends and knowing that I can flop in any of their beds at any time and watch a show or listen to music or talk about our day or make them a cake and giggle over stories or go out or just be. <3
So if any of you are reading this, a huge, colorful and sincere THANK YOU Abby, Katie and Ali. <3
XOXO
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Day 80: Teaching about Thanksgiving
For the 1-4th graders, I had them make hand turkeys or turkeys out of toilet paper rolls and write on their feathers what they were thankful for this year. It was really adorable. The kids all were so excited to bring a toilet paper roll from home! :) My favorite teacher helped me explain the story of Thanksgiving to all the 6-9 year olds by having the kids pretend they were the Pilgrims in a big boat. :) It was overall a huge success! When I had them write what they were grateful for, a few of the little kids wrote, "I'm thankful for the Indians for giving us food." SO. ADORABLE!
Then the teachers asked me to teach the high schoolers about Thanksgiving, as well. I figured they already had to know some things about it, and it certainly wouldn't take me 20 minutes to explain the history of it in words they could understand all while repeating each section of the story in twenty different ways. But I obeyed and taught them about it - for all of five minutes.
"So basically we wake up. We watch the Macy's Day Parade. Then we cook. Then we eat lots of food - including turkey and mashed potatoes and stuff. Then, we go to sleep - because we ate a lot and drank a lot. Then we watch football and have dessert. Then we eat more a little later."
They all nodded their heads.
"The first Thanksgiving was in 1621. The year before, over 100 people from England came to America in a boat called the Mayflower. These people were called 'Pilgrims.' When they arrived in Massachusetts that November, they were hungry and did not know much about planting food in the New World. Half of them died the first winter. Eventually, Native American Indians came along and helped the Pilgrims, and within a year they had a large amount of food and had a three day feast to celebrate. In all honesty, the tradition of a harvest feast was nothing new, as it had been a pagan tradition that had dated back hundreds - if not thousands - of years. All did not end well, as the Indians did not survive much longer, themselves."
To be honest, I didn't really know any details about Thanksgiving until Monday morning, when I got on the computer and started researching it so I could tell my 1st graders all about it without giving them incorrect information. >_< I told my high schoolers this and they laughed. I did, too. It takes coming to a foreign country to start learning about my own! I feel like this is actually not that strange... when you're in your own language and culture, you don't think about these things.
After my five minute explanation was done, I switched to a topic I knew they'd find far more facinating: Black Friday.
As I guessed, they loved it.
I told them all about it, what it was like and told them about my most successful Black Friday experience with my grandma back in 2007 (omg that sounds soooo long ago, but it doesn't feel like it was very long ago AT ALL!). I pulled up a video of shoppers at Target on a Black Friday a few years ago as they ran into the store when it opened at 4 am, screaming and hollering. I also pulled up the Black Friday 2012 deals. They were speechless! They'd never heard of such a thing! At first I thought they were judging me and my culture. "Oh those Americans. How materialistic can you get!?" And so I asked them how they thought something like this would go over in Spain.
"Oh, it'd never work out."
I asked them why not, a little upset by their answer.
"Because we're not as nice here in Spain! Way more people would get injured. People would go crazy. They'd love it. They'd push people around and tons of people would have to go to the hospital. The stores here just aren't big enough for that sort of thing, and people aren't level-headed enough, nor do they have enough manners!"
Haha! They all then said they wondered if they'd have enough time if they caught a plane RIGHT after school to get to America for the sales! Ha! :) They couldn't believe how cheap iPads and iPhones were going to be - plus all the video games and other electronics. They were totally into it. :) WIN!
Along with it, I showed them some videos from the Macy's Day Parade and an eight minute clip from the best moments from "Friends" during their Thanksgiving Day episodes. :) 'Cause I'm awesome like that!
Sometimes, just sometimes, I feel like I'm a pretty cool teacher. Who else would have taken an hour to teach high school kids about Black Friday? Who else would have pulled up crazy Youtube videos and drawn out a sample Black Friday Strategy Map for them? Who else would have pulled up the latest ads and shopped through them with the students? Who else would have googled "Wal-mart shoppers" and shown them the type of people who sometimes frequent Wal-mart and why it has such a funny/awful reputation (kids here have never heard of Wal-mart - SO WEIRD!!).
I'm not sure how much ENGLISH I'm teaching these kids, per-say. We don't go over grammar, verb tenses. I don't generally correct them when they talk and I don't do workbook or textbook stuff with them. I don't make them talk if they don't want to and I never test their comprehension of what I'm telling them about. But I do introduce them to some pretty culturally relavent things - things nobody else has ever (or would ever!) tell them. I'm real with them and make each class in which I'm in charge of the lesson for the day fun and like an open conversation. I'm always bubbly and excited and I tell jokes and I do little dances. I try to show them the type of things I wish my Spanish teachers would have shown me when I was in Spanish classes. I try to be the kind of native language conversation teacher I'd have loved to have when I was 16.
I guess I'm going off my own, personal philosophy that if you can get students interested in the culture of the language they're learning... if you can get them giggling and singing... if you can shock them and tell them interesting and weird things that nobody else would tell them... if you can be passionate about your own culture and the oddities that make it so cool and unique... well then maybe you can add a little motivation towards the language that they otherwise never would have had. If you can relate things to their own life and age group... if you can show them things that make America look cool... if you can talk with them like they're on your level... maybe it will make the language seem less "foreign" and more fun.
Last summer, L would tell me about her English teachers when she was younger in Romania. How they were so nice and so fun and make her really enjoy learning English. When she told me about them, I knew I wanted to be one of those teachers. One of those teachers who you look back on and say, "Wow! They really taught me some culturally relevant stuff that none of my textbooks or teachers even knew about. Knowing how to form the subjunctive versus knowing what Wal-mart is, what stereotypical Wal-mart shoppers are like and where to get the best deals on Black Friday in America? Knowing the top internet memes, the viral Youtube videos from the past few years, the newest music, the funniest TV shows, etc.? The subjunctive will not win you any friends. The other stuff? You walk up to any cool American with your cute little Spanish accent and start carry on a conversation about any of those things and you will have instantly just won yourself some friends."
XOXO
Then the teachers asked me to teach the high schoolers about Thanksgiving, as well. I figured they already had to know some things about it, and it certainly wouldn't take me 20 minutes to explain the history of it in words they could understand all while repeating each section of the story in twenty different ways. But I obeyed and taught them about it - for all of five minutes.
"So basically we wake up. We watch the Macy's Day Parade. Then we cook. Then we eat lots of food - including turkey and mashed potatoes and stuff. Then, we go to sleep - because we ate a lot and drank a lot. Then we watch football and have dessert. Then we eat more a little later."
They all nodded their heads.
"The first Thanksgiving was in 1621. The year before, over 100 people from England came to America in a boat called the Mayflower. These people were called 'Pilgrims.' When they arrived in Massachusetts that November, they were hungry and did not know much about planting food in the New World. Half of them died the first winter. Eventually, Native American Indians came along and helped the Pilgrims, and within a year they had a large amount of food and had a three day feast to celebrate. In all honesty, the tradition of a harvest feast was nothing new, as it had been a pagan tradition that had dated back hundreds - if not thousands - of years. All did not end well, as the Indians did not survive much longer, themselves."
To be honest, I didn't really know any details about Thanksgiving until Monday morning, when I got on the computer and started researching it so I could tell my 1st graders all about it without giving them incorrect information. >_< I told my high schoolers this and they laughed. I did, too. It takes coming to a foreign country to start learning about my own! I feel like this is actually not that strange... when you're in your own language and culture, you don't think about these things.
After my five minute explanation was done, I switched to a topic I knew they'd find far more facinating: Black Friday.
As I guessed, they loved it.
I told them all about it, what it was like and told them about my most successful Black Friday experience with my grandma back in 2007 (omg that sounds soooo long ago, but it doesn't feel like it was very long ago AT ALL!). I pulled up a video of shoppers at Target on a Black Friday a few years ago as they ran into the store when it opened at 4 am, screaming and hollering. I also pulled up the Black Friday 2012 deals. They were speechless! They'd never heard of such a thing! At first I thought they were judging me and my culture. "Oh those Americans. How materialistic can you get!?" And so I asked them how they thought something like this would go over in Spain.
"Oh, it'd never work out."
I asked them why not, a little upset by their answer.
"Because we're not as nice here in Spain! Way more people would get injured. People would go crazy. They'd love it. They'd push people around and tons of people would have to go to the hospital. The stores here just aren't big enough for that sort of thing, and people aren't level-headed enough, nor do they have enough manners!"
Haha! They all then said they wondered if they'd have enough time if they caught a plane RIGHT after school to get to America for the sales! Ha! :) They couldn't believe how cheap iPads and iPhones were going to be - plus all the video games and other electronics. They were totally into it. :) WIN!
Along with it, I showed them some videos from the Macy's Day Parade and an eight minute clip from the best moments from "Friends" during their Thanksgiving Day episodes. :) 'Cause I'm awesome like that!
Sometimes, just sometimes, I feel like I'm a pretty cool teacher. Who else would have taken an hour to teach high school kids about Black Friday? Who else would have pulled up crazy Youtube videos and drawn out a sample Black Friday Strategy Map for them? Who else would have pulled up the latest ads and shopped through them with the students? Who else would have googled "Wal-mart shoppers" and shown them the type of people who sometimes frequent Wal-mart and why it has such a funny/awful reputation (kids here have never heard of Wal-mart - SO WEIRD!!).
I'm not sure how much ENGLISH I'm teaching these kids, per-say. We don't go over grammar, verb tenses. I don't generally correct them when they talk and I don't do workbook or textbook stuff with them. I don't make them talk if they don't want to and I never test their comprehension of what I'm telling them about. But I do introduce them to some pretty culturally relavent things - things nobody else has ever (or would ever!) tell them. I'm real with them and make each class in which I'm in charge of the lesson for the day fun and like an open conversation. I'm always bubbly and excited and I tell jokes and I do little dances. I try to show them the type of things I wish my Spanish teachers would have shown me when I was in Spanish classes. I try to be the kind of native language conversation teacher I'd have loved to have when I was 16.
I guess I'm going off my own, personal philosophy that if you can get students interested in the culture of the language they're learning... if you can get them giggling and singing... if you can shock them and tell them interesting and weird things that nobody else would tell them... if you can be passionate about your own culture and the oddities that make it so cool and unique... well then maybe you can add a little motivation towards the language that they otherwise never would have had. If you can relate things to their own life and age group... if you can show them things that make America look cool... if you can talk with them like they're on your level... maybe it will make the language seem less "foreign" and more fun.
Last summer, L would tell me about her English teachers when she was younger in Romania. How they were so nice and so fun and make her really enjoy learning English. When she told me about them, I knew I wanted to be one of those teachers. One of those teachers who you look back on and say, "Wow! They really taught me some culturally relevant stuff that none of my textbooks or teachers even knew about. Knowing how to form the subjunctive versus knowing what Wal-mart is, what stereotypical Wal-mart shoppers are like and where to get the best deals on Black Friday in America? Knowing the top internet memes, the viral Youtube videos from the past few years, the newest music, the funniest TV shows, etc.? The subjunctive will not win you any friends. The other stuff? You walk up to any cool American with your cute little Spanish accent and start carry on a conversation about any of those things and you will have instantly just won yourself some friends."
XOXO
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Day 79: Tango
I skipped last week's lesson, which made me question my desire to continue with tango lessons. Beginner level is too easy for me -- the reason I love partner dancing so much is the challenge of it all. I want to always be on my toes (literally and figuratively!). It's completely mentally stimulating and makes my brain and my body work as a closely-knit team, all while testing my ability to surrender control completely. Ah - it's brilliant fun!
(Can you tell I've been teaching from a British text book? These damn phrases are starting to rub off on me...)
Thankfully, tonight's class was awesome. :) I got to dance with the student helper from the advanced classes a ton, and also with Julio, who's my favorite person to dance with in the class, because he is the only one with a solid, great connection and lead. I usually don't like dancing with the student helper because his lead is so vague, but tonight he started playing around with the steps on me and I couldn't get enough. The most amazing part of partner dance is when the lead starts to clearly test you. They'll throw step after step at you, seeing if you can decipher it, seeing if you can keep up, seeing how much you're truly following them versus trying to guess what's about to happen.
For the most part, I did wonderfully, and he noticed. This guy is probably younger than me, completely silent and stoic, and I can't quite figure out why he's a dancer. But then, lots of good dancers I've known are the quiet, awkward type... so... Anyway, at one point he actually nodded and smiled when I followed him correctly on a step I'd never been taught. Hell. Yes. We continued dancing and inevitably I did a step wrong. I looked up to giggle at him and shrug, but he immediately said, "Oh - my bad! That was an advanced step. Sorry." I politely informed him that I wouldn't mind at all if he'd like to continue doing advanced steps and throwing me off a bit, because these six steps that we've been taught are beginning to bore me. He giggled nervously and went back to the basic. ARG. >_<
Anyway, I left tango class feeling invigorated as usual. :) No way I'm quitting my Tuesday ritual. Partner dancing is one of those things I just adore and stimulates and challenges and awes me. Maybe in January I'll start taking two lessons a week so that I can start taking intermediate classes with Julio. I rather dance classes be ridiculously too hard for me than ridiculously too easy... ;)
XOXO
(Can you tell I've been teaching from a British text book? These damn phrases are starting to rub off on me...)
Thankfully, tonight's class was awesome. :) I got to dance with the student helper from the advanced classes a ton, and also with Julio, who's my favorite person to dance with in the class, because he is the only one with a solid, great connection and lead. I usually don't like dancing with the student helper because his lead is so vague, but tonight he started playing around with the steps on me and I couldn't get enough. The most amazing part of partner dance is when the lead starts to clearly test you. They'll throw step after step at you, seeing if you can decipher it, seeing if you can keep up, seeing how much you're truly following them versus trying to guess what's about to happen.
For the most part, I did wonderfully, and he noticed. This guy is probably younger than me, completely silent and stoic, and I can't quite figure out why he's a dancer. But then, lots of good dancers I've known are the quiet, awkward type... so... Anyway, at one point he actually nodded and smiled when I followed him correctly on a step I'd never been taught. Hell. Yes. We continued dancing and inevitably I did a step wrong. I looked up to giggle at him and shrug, but he immediately said, "Oh - my bad! That was an advanced step. Sorry." I politely informed him that I wouldn't mind at all if he'd like to continue doing advanced steps and throwing me off a bit, because these six steps that we've been taught are beginning to bore me. He giggled nervously and went back to the basic. ARG. >_<
Anyway, I left tango class feeling invigorated as usual. :) No way I'm quitting my Tuesday ritual. Partner dancing is one of those things I just adore and stimulates and challenges and awes me. Maybe in January I'll start taking two lessons a week so that I can start taking intermediate classes with Julio. I rather dance classes be ridiculously too hard for me than ridiculously too easy... ;)
XOXO
Day 78: Frenchies!
As soon as I walked through the door, I was greeted by a mini birthday celebration! It was Olivia's birthday - one of my French roommates. :) Gaelle, the other French roomie, made leek quiche for all of us for dinner to celebrate. She also made us an apple tartlette with caramel swirl ice cream and whipped cream for the birthday cake. :) Yummmy!! French food was super yucky when I was actually in France, but these girls made me start to change my opinion on it all. ;) Of course, at this point I would probably embrace any type of cuisine that actually has flavor to it. Freak'n Spanish food...
XOXO
XOXO
Monday, November 19, 2012
Days 76/77: Crayon Blisters
I worked so hard in my 11 hour class on Saturday that I got a big blister on my thumb...
... from coloring with crayons so intensely.
That's right - I colored a few panda bears, I colored door name tags for my roomies, I colored in some doodles, I colored a few giraffes and I even did that thing where you color every color on a sheet of paper and then color over it with a black crayon and then carve a pattern into it!!! It actually turned out amazing, by the way. ;)
Yeah. That was my Saturday. Crayons.
How is this teacher so awful? It's like bordering on impressive she's so bad. Like maybe she's a decoy and they're using her to demonstrate to us how to NEVER be as a teacher?! Brother. >_<
After class Abby and I went on an Oreo mission and watched TV and did an "Oreo Power Hour" with a nice glass of milk. :oD
Sunday was spent doing what we do best - cleaning our room (with a whole other packet of Oreos and a glass of milk!!) and then becoming vegetables in front of our computer screens. Ooooh yeah!! :) We did wake up at 10:30 today (wtf?) and I did make us puffed pancakes and bought us a Rubik's cube to start practicing our cubing skills with... and Abby did do a deep clean of our desk and floor and went on a run... but still... we were pretty GLORIOUSLY lazy. ^_^ I love spending my lazy Sundays with this girl! :)
In good news, I wrote my big Friday blog and wrote a 17 page rough draft of my thesis. Woohoo. ;)
XOXO
... from coloring with crayons so intensely.
That's right - I colored a few panda bears, I colored door name tags for my roomies, I colored in some doodles, I colored a few giraffes and I even did that thing where you color every color on a sheet of paper and then color over it with a black crayon and then carve a pattern into it!!! It actually turned out amazing, by the way. ;)
Yeah. That was my Saturday. Crayons.
How is this teacher so awful? It's like bordering on impressive she's so bad. Like maybe she's a decoy and they're using her to demonstrate to us how to NEVER be as a teacher?! Brother. >_<
After class Abby and I went on an Oreo mission and watched TV and did an "Oreo Power Hour" with a nice glass of milk. :oD
Sunday was spent doing what we do best - cleaning our room (with a whole other packet of Oreos and a glass of milk!!) and then becoming vegetables in front of our computer screens. Ooooh yeah!! :) We did wake up at 10:30 today (wtf?) and I did make us puffed pancakes and bought us a Rubik's cube to start practicing our cubing skills with... and Abby did do a deep clean of our desk and floor and went on a run... but still... we were pretty GLORIOUSLY lazy. ^_^ I love spending my lazy Sundays with this girl! :)
In good news, I wrote my big Friday blog and wrote a 17 page rough draft of my thesis. Woohoo. ;)
XOXO
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Day 75: Spanish Mom's Birthday Dinner!
Two Hours of Teaching!
In which the second graders had an English test and the last activity was a listening exercise in which students had to listen to a boy talk about where he lived, what he liked to do and who is favorite soccer team was. The two choices on the test? Manchester United and Chelsea!! All of the kids circled "Chelsea" as the correct answer before the teacher even played the recording.
"No, guys. You have to listen to the BOY on the recording and circle which team HE likes. Not which team YOU like," the teacher told them.
"But everybody likes Chelsea!" half the class hollered.
I was beaming and made a "Hell Yes!" gesture at them out of complete solidarity with their logic.
The teacher played the recording. We all held our breath. As soon as the boy said, "Chelsea is my favorite football team!" the whole class began to cheer!!!!
It was SO adorable!!!
^_^
I walked around the room. Not one kid got the answer to that test question wrong. ;) BA.
My only other class of the day was with the 10th graders, where the idea of a Culture Book was presented to them. Basically, they have to make a book all about Spanish culture and send it to a class in the US, who will make a book about US culture and send it back to them, so that the two classes can compare. Cute idea, but I'm in charge of finding what school we'll send it to in the US and so far I have no idea!! >_<Haha.
Anyway, we were discussing the topics they should cover in pairs and they kept vetoing all of the ideas. "Clothing is totally the same in the US. We don't need to write about that!" the all said. I stared at them.
"ExCUSE me?" I said, incrediously. "We dress like crap in the US, and we're proud of it. The worse you look, the hotter you are. This is like the rule of thumb for teenagers / early 20-somethings - at least from where I come from. You have a baggy hoodie, baggy sweatpants and Ugg boots or flip flops? You're golden. Automatically adorable and trendy. No problem."
They stared at me, confused.
"Oh no, I'm serious. While you guys are in your preppy little uniforms here, people at my high school in your grade are wearing PJ pants and cozy hoodies and slipper-boots. Their hair is up in a greasy bun and they feel attractive and awesome."
They all started to giggle.
"I live with three other American girls here in Spain. Two of them always are European chic, while the other two of us have no problem running to the corner store to pick up milk or cookies in our sweat pants and flip flops and hoodie/PJ shirt with our messy bun or braid. 'Why not!?' we say. 'Who's going to see us? And more importantly, who gives a crap!?' Our other two roommates look on in horror as we walk out the door looking American as heck."
Now they were full-out laughing.
"Here? You guys always look so freak'n adorable. You have your classy leather boots and you're little ballerina flats that never have a scuff on them. You have your perfect little skinny jeans and your cute little leather jackets. You're always wearing a chic scarf and your hair always looks good and tights with dresses or shorts or legwarmers are totally a thing here. It would be flat out annoying if it weren't so endearing."
They started asking if we really didn't dress like that in the US!?
"Well no - not really. Boots are Uggs. Ballerina flats are tennis shoes. Leather jackets make you look like you're from 'Happy Days' and scarfts are big, bulky things you wear in winter. Tights are for ballerinas. But don't get me wrong. We Americans LOVE your European style. We read blogs about it. We study up on it. We want to look EXACTLY LIKE YOU GUYS DO!!!"
Their minds were blown.
Without a doubt.
The next topic was food. They didn't believe it could be that different, but come on, guys. First off - American food is diverse and has FLAVOR... unlike food here!!! Tapas don't exist outside of Spain and a group of boys actually were totally taken aback by this fact *facepalm*. And tortilla? That's a Mexican flour thing used for burritos and fajitas - it's not bits of potato and pepper chopped up and doused in oil and then made into a circle with the help of lots of scrambly eggs mixed in. And how about the infamous "jamon serano," or, Serano Ham. This is a giant, raw (albeit cured) pig leg that lives in your house on a special wooden plank and you slice off a bit at a time each day and eat it. It is a bit like raw, salty, chewy bacon, if you can imagine that...? Haha.
These types of conversations ensued for the remainder of class. The most epic moment in these converstations was, without a bout, the moment a girl asked me if younger people in the US had swag.
O_o
What?!
I asked her if she could repeat the question. This is a girl in class who a) has never spoken and b) looks a ton like Woody's wife Jessi did in 10th grade, so she always makes me giggle. She repeated it and wrote it down. When I saw that I had heard her right I just started laughing and said, "Ohmygod. You are SO awesome!!"She smiled at me like I was nuts. I probably would have, too. Haha!! :oD
The class was actually pretty fun and I was surprised at how much I've grown accustom to Spanish culture in the past 75 days. I actually took some thinking to tell them about American culture and I was surprised myself about how many things were different here than they are where I'm from and lived for 22 years of my life! I've really began to completely adapt to life here and hardly anything seems out of the ordinary any more. o_O
I can see why the reentry was so awful last year. I can't even begin to imagine what it would be like for me to go back home now, and last summer I was even more blissfully content than I am now. Suddenly I can see why I was so upset, so bitter, so out of place. It makes perfect sense and I don't fault myself for it anymore like I did. Nobody who's never lived abroad can understand what reentry is like. It's awful. It's beyond awful. Culture shock is expected, but when you go home, suddenly everything you've ever held as The Way Things Are seems all wrong and even the people closest to you can't see it. It feels so lonely and scary and devastating.
Every day that I'm here I miss J and I think about a different memory from living in Portland. Every single day. But then I stopped and thought about it tonight and I thought, "If you had the chance to go back at 88 days, just like you did last summer, would you?"
My answer was an unequivocal, "No." It both surprised me and it didn't.
I was talking to Abby on Saturday night while we were having a few pre-gaming drinks about how now that I thought about it, Portland was really actually awesome, but while I was there, I just was so depressed all the time. I've been thinking about that all week and realized I do that often. I am unsatisfied with where I am, who I'm with, who I am, etc. and then as soon as it's gone, I suddenly see all the good in it. The only time I don't do this is when I'm abroad and on my own. Then I suddenly have a much clearer perspective. I've resolved to go back to my ideology of "One day you'll be nostalgic for now" and live by it. I need to do that. I will always miss something and feel like there is a big hole inside of me - if I didn't, it would only mean that I hadn't lived life to the fullest right before. But that's no reason to taint the present. I missed J when I got to Spain. I missed Spain when I got to J. I miss J now that I'm back in Spain. >_<
And so this week I've tried something different. I've tried to take each memory and moment that pops into my head and would normally make me feel a little sad and nostalgic and I've turned those into little bubbles of happiness that put a smile on my face. Instead of thinking, "What if I never feel that way again? What if I never have that again? What if I never see her again?" I start thinking, "What an amazing life I've had so far! How lucky and blessed I am! Things can only get better - imagine what will happen from here! Who do I want to be and what do I want to have experienced by the next time I see her?!" Now, I look forward to each memory and moment and thought that pops into my head. They all make me smile. They all make me feel loved. They all make me feel lucky.
It's like that Winnie the Pooh quote, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard!" ^_^ <3
Anyway, after teaching it was time for the second weekend marathon of university classes. Five hours of class later with the Impressively Awful Teacher and I'd (unsurprisingly) learned nothing. I vowed to bring crayons to class the next day so I'd have something to do. Sheesh.
The really exciting part of my Friday though, really got underway after 9 pm. :)
Earlier in the week my Spanish mom had txted me to invite me to her birthday dinner at home. I was so excited to go and to see everyone that I could hardly contain myself! I got on Pinterest and found the perfect project and worked on it instead of eating lunch. Even though I got out of class later than I'd expected, I still made it to the bus stop on time and was at their front door right around 9:30 (I'm never on time and they plan for that, I think, by now)!! I did a little squeal when I rang the doorbell, feeling like I was home (adorable). <3 I hadn't seen everyone since the weekend of their anniversary party in Segovia and I hadn't been home in over a month!
I walked in the door and was bombarded with kisses and hugs! <3 Yay!! Everyone was dressed up all cute and the table was set in a festive way. As it turned out, we were having fondue for dinner!!! The kind where you put raw meet in the fondue pot and it cooks and you dip it in a bunch of yummy sauces. :) Jen and I felt like we were at the Melting Pot - which is where I went for MY birthday! :) We had a yummy dinner and two different cakes, all the while having really funny conversations!! The best conversation topic was definitely when somebody brought up cocaine tea from Peru! My madre started talking about how she'd tried it and it really wasn't that big of a deal and I could not stop laughing!!! ^_^ Jesus made some comment under his breath and I started giggling at him. He looked up and asked, "You understood that!?" I said, "Yeah... weird, right? I don't know what's happening with my Spanish. It's like I can suddenly understand things for no reason!" Seriously!
After dinner my Spanish mom asked what I was up to for Christmas break. She told me all the kids would be gone so if I wanted "come home for the holidays" they'd love to have me there!! <3 How completely and utterly adorable!!! ^_^ I told her about my plans for my European adventure. I told her how my friend had promised she'd come but how that hadn't worked out and she would be going somewhere with her new boyfriend instead. Cruz stopped me. "Wait, you mean Julia?" I nodded. "But I thought she was gay?" I laughed and said, "Right!?" My madre gave me one of those infamous, exasperated, wtf roll of her eyes and said, "Well then by all means, GO on that trip. Have so much fun you can't stand it. Take as many pictures as you can!" And then, all of a sudden, she did the "FUCK HER!" Spanish arm gesture!!!!!!
I practically peed my pants I was laughing so hard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Being at home with my Spanish family, giggling, eating, drinking and conversing all in Spanish was the best. I love how they make me feel like I really am their daughter. Knowing that I always have somewhere to go here with people who adore me and support me, makes me feel so happy. <3
XOXO
Four Hours of Family Time!
In which
In which the second graders had an English test and the last activity was a listening exercise in which students had to listen to a boy talk about where he lived, what he liked to do and who is favorite soccer team was. The two choices on the test? Manchester United and Chelsea!! All of the kids circled "Chelsea" as the correct answer before the teacher even played the recording.
"No, guys. You have to listen to the BOY on the recording and circle which team HE likes. Not which team YOU like," the teacher told them.
"But everybody likes Chelsea!" half the class hollered.
I was beaming and made a "Hell Yes!" gesture at them out of complete solidarity with their logic.
The teacher played the recording. We all held our breath. As soon as the boy said, "Chelsea is my favorite football team!" the whole class began to cheer!!!!
It was SO adorable!!!
^_^
I walked around the room. Not one kid got the answer to that test question wrong. ;) BA.
My only other class of the day was with the 10th graders, where the idea of a Culture Book was presented to them. Basically, they have to make a book all about Spanish culture and send it to a class in the US, who will make a book about US culture and send it back to them, so that the two classes can compare. Cute idea, but I'm in charge of finding what school we'll send it to in the US and so far I have no idea!! >_<Haha.
Anyway, we were discussing the topics they should cover in pairs and they kept vetoing all of the ideas. "Clothing is totally the same in the US. We don't need to write about that!" the all said. I stared at them.
"ExCUSE me?" I said, incrediously. "We dress like crap in the US, and we're proud of it. The worse you look, the hotter you are. This is like the rule of thumb for teenagers / early 20-somethings - at least from where I come from. You have a baggy hoodie, baggy sweatpants and Ugg boots or flip flops? You're golden. Automatically adorable and trendy. No problem."
They stared at me, confused.
"Oh no, I'm serious. While you guys are in your preppy little uniforms here, people at my high school in your grade are wearing PJ pants and cozy hoodies and slipper-boots. Their hair is up in a greasy bun and they feel attractive and awesome."
They all started to giggle.
"I live with three other American girls here in Spain. Two of them always are European chic, while the other two of us have no problem running to the corner store to pick up milk or cookies in our sweat pants and flip flops and hoodie/PJ shirt with our messy bun or braid. 'Why not!?' we say. 'Who's going to see us? And more importantly, who gives a crap!?' Our other two roommates look on in horror as we walk out the door looking American as heck."
Now they were full-out laughing.
"Here? You guys always look so freak'n adorable. You have your classy leather boots and you're little ballerina flats that never have a scuff on them. You have your perfect little skinny jeans and your cute little leather jackets. You're always wearing a chic scarf and your hair always looks good and tights with dresses or shorts or legwarmers are totally a thing here. It would be flat out annoying if it weren't so endearing."
They started asking if we really didn't dress like that in the US!?
"Well no - not really. Boots are Uggs. Ballerina flats are tennis shoes. Leather jackets make you look like you're from 'Happy Days' and scarfts are big, bulky things you wear in winter. Tights are for ballerinas. But don't get me wrong. We Americans LOVE your European style. We read blogs about it. We study up on it. We want to look EXACTLY LIKE YOU GUYS DO!!!"
Their minds were blown.
Without a doubt.
The next topic was food. They didn't believe it could be that different, but come on, guys. First off - American food is diverse and has FLAVOR... unlike food here!!! Tapas don't exist outside of Spain and a group of boys actually were totally taken aback by this fact *facepalm*. And tortilla? That's a Mexican flour thing used for burritos and fajitas - it's not bits of potato and pepper chopped up and doused in oil and then made into a circle with the help of lots of scrambly eggs mixed in. And how about the infamous "jamon serano," or, Serano Ham. This is a giant, raw (albeit cured) pig leg that lives in your house on a special wooden plank and you slice off a bit at a time each day and eat it. It is a bit like raw, salty, chewy bacon, if you can imagine that...? Haha.
These types of conversations ensued for the remainder of class. The most epic moment in these converstations was, without a bout, the moment a girl asked me if younger people in the US had swag.
O_o
What?!
I asked her if she could repeat the question. This is a girl in class who a) has never spoken and b) looks a ton like Woody's wife Jessi did in 10th grade, so she always makes me giggle. She repeated it and wrote it down. When I saw that I had heard her right I just started laughing and said, "Ohmygod. You are SO awesome!!"She smiled at me like I was nuts. I probably would have, too. Haha!! :oD
The class was actually pretty fun and I was surprised at how much I've grown accustom to Spanish culture in the past 75 days. I actually took some thinking to tell them about American culture and I was surprised myself about how many things were different here than they are where I'm from and lived for 22 years of my life! I've really began to completely adapt to life here and hardly anything seems out of the ordinary any more. o_O
I can see why the reentry was so awful last year. I can't even begin to imagine what it would be like for me to go back home now, and last summer I was even more blissfully content than I am now. Suddenly I can see why I was so upset, so bitter, so out of place. It makes perfect sense and I don't fault myself for it anymore like I did. Nobody who's never lived abroad can understand what reentry is like. It's awful. It's beyond awful. Culture shock is expected, but when you go home, suddenly everything you've ever held as The Way Things Are seems all wrong and even the people closest to you can't see it. It feels so lonely and scary and devastating.
Every day that I'm here I miss J and I think about a different memory from living in Portland. Every single day. But then I stopped and thought about it tonight and I thought, "If you had the chance to go back at 88 days, just like you did last summer, would you?"
My answer was an unequivocal, "No." It both surprised me and it didn't.
I was talking to Abby on Saturday night while we were having a few pre-gaming drinks about how now that I thought about it, Portland was really actually awesome, but while I was there, I just was so depressed all the time. I've been thinking about that all week and realized I do that often. I am unsatisfied with where I am, who I'm with, who I am, etc. and then as soon as it's gone, I suddenly see all the good in it. The only time I don't do this is when I'm abroad and on my own. Then I suddenly have a much clearer perspective. I've resolved to go back to my ideology of "One day you'll be nostalgic for now" and live by it. I need to do that. I will always miss something and feel like there is a big hole inside of me - if I didn't, it would only mean that I hadn't lived life to the fullest right before. But that's no reason to taint the present. I missed J when I got to Spain. I missed Spain when I got to J. I miss J now that I'm back in Spain. >_<
And so this week I've tried something different. I've tried to take each memory and moment that pops into my head and would normally make me feel a little sad and nostalgic and I've turned those into little bubbles of happiness that put a smile on my face. Instead of thinking, "What if I never feel that way again? What if I never have that again? What if I never see her again?" I start thinking, "What an amazing life I've had so far! How lucky and blessed I am! Things can only get better - imagine what will happen from here! Who do I want to be and what do I want to have experienced by the next time I see her?!" Now, I look forward to each memory and moment and thought that pops into my head. They all make me smile. They all make me feel loved. They all make me feel lucky.
It's like that Winnie the Pooh quote, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard!" ^_^ <3
Anyway, after teaching it was time for the second weekend marathon of university classes. Five hours of class later with the Impressively Awful Teacher and I'd (unsurprisingly) learned nothing. I vowed to bring crayons to class the next day so I'd have something to do. Sheesh.
The really exciting part of my Friday though, really got underway after 9 pm. :)
Earlier in the week my Spanish mom had txted me to invite me to her birthday dinner at home. I was so excited to go and to see everyone that I could hardly contain myself! I got on Pinterest and found the perfect project and worked on it instead of eating lunch. Even though I got out of class later than I'd expected, I still made it to the bus stop on time and was at their front door right around 9:30 (I'm never on time and they plan for that, I think, by now)!! I did a little squeal when I rang the doorbell, feeling like I was home (adorable). <3 I hadn't seen everyone since the weekend of their anniversary party in Segovia and I hadn't been home in over a month!
I walked in the door and was bombarded with kisses and hugs! <3 Yay!! Everyone was dressed up all cute and the table was set in a festive way. As it turned out, we were having fondue for dinner!!! The kind where you put raw meet in the fondue pot and it cooks and you dip it in a bunch of yummy sauces. :) Jen and I felt like we were at the Melting Pot - which is where I went for MY birthday! :) We had a yummy dinner and two different cakes, all the while having really funny conversations!! The best conversation topic was definitely when somebody brought up cocaine tea from Peru! My madre started talking about how she'd tried it and it really wasn't that big of a deal and I could not stop laughing!!! ^_^ Jesus made some comment under his breath and I started giggling at him. He looked up and asked, "You understood that!?" I said, "Yeah... weird, right? I don't know what's happening with my Spanish. It's like I can suddenly understand things for no reason!" Seriously!
After dinner my Spanish mom asked what I was up to for Christmas break. She told me all the kids would be gone so if I wanted "come home for the holidays" they'd love to have me there!! <3 How completely and utterly adorable!!! ^_^ I told her about my plans for my European adventure. I told her how my friend had promised she'd come but how that hadn't worked out and she would be going somewhere with her new boyfriend instead. Cruz stopped me. "Wait, you mean Julia?" I nodded. "But I thought she was gay?" I laughed and said, "Right!?" My madre gave me one of those infamous, exasperated, wtf roll of her eyes and said, "Well then by all means, GO on that trip. Have so much fun you can't stand it. Take as many pictures as you can!" And then, all of a sudden, she did the "FUCK HER!" Spanish arm gesture!!!!!!
I practically peed my pants I was laughing so hard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Being at home with my Spanish family, giggling, eating, drinking and conversing all in Spanish was the best. I love how they make me feel like I really am their daughter. Knowing that I always have somewhere to go here with people who adore me and support me, makes me feel so happy. <3
XOXO
Four Hours of Family Time!
In which
Friday, November 16, 2012
Day 73/74: Huelga, etc.
Let's be real, after such an amazing day on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday really had no shot!
On Wednesday it was school as usual, followed by tutoring classes as usual, followed by me realizing the huelga meant to bus ride home, followed by a leisurely night stroll in the moonlight home (sometimes I take a moment to acknowledge how awesome I am - like when I figured out that instead of a bus ride home I'd be walking for an hour, I didn't get upset at all - I merely felt grateful I had tried the walk home a few weeks earlier before daylight savings time kicked in so I knew where to go - hahaha!), followed by a trip to the grocery store for all that pasta that I will be eating for the next week (lol), followed by a quiet night at home with my roomies bffs. :)
Thursday was much the same (only I did have a train to take me home - thank goodness!).
Nothing too exciting, but a nice, calm day after so much adventure!
XOXO
On Wednesday it was school as usual, followed by tutoring classes as usual, followed by me realizing the huelga meant to bus ride home, followed by a leisurely night stroll in the moonlight home (sometimes I take a moment to acknowledge how awesome I am - like when I figured out that instead of a bus ride home I'd be walking for an hour, I didn't get upset at all - I merely felt grateful I had tried the walk home a few weeks earlier before daylight savings time kicked in so I knew where to go - hahaha!), followed by a trip to the grocery store for all that pasta that I will be eating for the next week (lol), followed by a quiet night at home with my roomies bffs. :)
Thursday was much the same (only I did have a train to take me home - thank goodness!).
Nothing too exciting, but a nice, calm day after so much adventure!
XOXO
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Day 72: Dream Day ^_^
Today was amazing.
This is the first blog post I've had this trip that I'm afraid to write, because I'm scared I won't do the day justice. I remember having that feeling a lot last summer while I was here and it frustrated me and made me so happy at the same time. :)
So here goes...
I woke up with enough time to put makeup on and put a little thought into my outfit. :) It was our day off of school to go into Madrid to do our finger prints for our Spanish ID card. Katie and I left around 9:15 and despite some serious freaking out about time, we made it to our appointment 15 minutes early. When we got there, we were greeting by a bit of a bureaucratic shit show. Apparently the others hadn't expected this like I had, because lots of people in our group were pretty complainy about it all. See, our director had really messed up (as usual) and informed us at the last minute a bunch of us needed new photos for our ID picture. While everyone else was pretty butt-hurt about this, I was delighted, as I didn't want my ridiculous looking blonde photograph to be my picture on my official Spanish ID card!!
After we got our photos retaken, our fingerprints done and our paperwork in order, it was time to start our leisurely adventure! After all, we had the day off, the weather was gorgeous and we could do whatever we wanted! And so as our first stop of the day, we decided to have lunch at an American 50's diner, called Peggy Sue's! We had to wait for a bit for it to open up, but once it did, we ran right in. We all ordered cookies 'n cream milkshakes and some yummy American food.
Next, it was off to Retiro Park!! I can't believe I've been here for practically two months and hadn't gone to Retiro before today. I absolutely adore that park - it's so calming and beautiful. Last summer, the long walks, getting lost, having picnics, people watching, exploring, zoning out to my iPod... it was the perfect, blissful place to spend an afternoon or night. <3
The park was no less breathtaking this afternoon. For the first time in weeks, the sun was out and the skies were completely blue. We laid down on the steps overlooking the little pond with the boats and soaked up the warmth while the enchanting sound of a saxophone danced on the water and filled the air. <3 Bliss.
It was honestly one of my infamous moments of, "Oh. My. God. I am in the middle of Madrid, Spain right now with a group of close friends sunbathing on the steps of Retiro Park, being serendaded by an anonymous saxophone. I must be in a movie. This is too amazing."
<3
After a bit the others decided they wanted a more comfy spot to sunbathe and wandered over to a grassy patch. Katie and I, though, wanted to do a little exploring, so we broke off from the others to take a stroll around the park. First, we saw two kitties posing adorably on a big statue. We quickly realized the were the first of many kitties to be spotted in the park (we saw at least 15!!).
First, we walked around the lake and took a few pictures. :)
While Katie stopped to fill her water bottle, I came across the man who had been playing the saxophone so magestically and gave him all the change I had. He was extremely grateful and stopped his song just to thank me. I smiled and thanked him for his music. <3
The saxophone was Conor's instrument. Just say'n.
We continued around the lake and an older gentleman asked if we would take a picture of him in front of the pond. We did and asked for one in return! :)
The park was absolutely gorgeous with the fall foliage and the bright sun shining through the trees and onto the paths made everything feel very surreal and whimsical.
As we were taking a stroll around the park, a man suddenly approached us, asking if we spoke English. We warily responded that we did, and quickly realized that he was a native speaker himself. He asked us if we had time to help him out with a research study he was doing for his graduate degree at Manchester University in England. We glanced at each other and then shook our heads yes. What did we have to lose!? Haha.
The "research" turned out to be seriously strange and oh-so-epic. He told us it was a study about lying and what the face does when it's lying versus telling the truth. What we had to do was this: record each other answering a list of questions about the man who had approached us and about a man who we'd been given a photograph of. The questions were extremely strange and started off innocent enough and then got odder as we kept recording.
First, we had to give our honest opinion of them physically, the answer if we would ever date them, then if we would ever introduce them to our friends and finally if we would ever have "relations" with them. The whole time the man was standing across the way out of hearing range. Katie and I couldn't stop giggling, wondering if this was indeed real research or if we were on some strange version of Candid Camera and what the prank was!?
Just as we thought we were done, he recorded us answering questions about each other:
Man: "What is Chelsea's favorite color?"
Katie: "Um... ALL of them."
Me: *laughing hysterically*
Man: "Uh, no... you have to pick just one."
Katie: "No, you don't understand. You haven't seen her jacket."
Me: *almost peeing my pants laughing*
The questions were all good and fine until he asked us to guess each others' underwear color!?! Without thinking about it, we did (and, may I say, we both got the answer correct). He said there was a study done that suggested questions like that one could really illustrate how close two people were, but I've definitely looked it up since then and am pretty darned sure he made that up.
When we finally were finished with his experiment, we briskly walked away, laughing and asking each other, "Wtf was that all about!?" Hahaha. Katie was a little embarrassed/ashamed. I was just totally amused and felt like I was in some strange, European Twilight Zone. o_O The man seemed so professional and serious that it is almost unfathomable to think that this was some sort of strange prank or something else, but the questions were just so odd that we cannot possibly figure out what kind of graduate research he would honestly be conducting for such a relatively reputable university!? Mystery. Haha.
By the time we finally got back to our friends, they were a bit impatient with us and were happy to finally be able to leave. We explored the park a bit together and came across the Crystal Palace (which was what Katie and I had actually set out to find, but had been so sidetracked by the strange video study thing that we never had a change to find it and go there). The Crystal Palace is just so beautiful - especially with the late afternoon sun shining through all of that glass!!
We continued our walk and came upon a crazy squirrel with some pretty intensely awesome, fuzzy ears! I whipped out my camera and took a bunch of photos of him, as he was just so unique - and brave! The others walked up to him to scare him away, but he just continued eating his bountiful merienda. :) I named him Kramer Squirrel - he just radiated that Seinfeld character's personality SO WELL - and had a nice chat with him before continuing onward. ;)
By this time it was just about 5:30 and everybody was ready to head home - except for me, of course! As I walked them to the train station, Ali called to see if my plan was still on for the night and if she had time
to come into Madrid to join in on the fun. "Duh!" ^_^
While
I waited for her, I decided to journey around the Letters' District -
in the DAYLIGHT for a change! Admittedly, I actually got more lost in
the sunshine than I do when the moon is the only celestial being
lighting my way. I guess I've just been getting much more used to
exploring Madrid at night than in the day time, and everything really
looks a lot different.
The first thing the light showed me that the dark had previous hidden was an adorable little note taped to a pipe on the side of a building. It was written as a sort of "Lost Connections" type letter... I think... if my Spanish serves me right (which, who knows, maybe it's actually a letter about how stupid fold-up bikes are - at least, that's what I thought it was about the first time I read it!?).
After reading the cute note a few times, I set forth to find that cookie shop. I went in a few circles, not remembering where it was and finding the daylight making things oddly more difficult, but at long last I found it and bought ten delicious, mini, homemade cookies! Yummmy!!! ^_^
I continued forth past Sol and up to Callao, towards our meeting spot. On the way I passed my favorite lingerie store - the one with that amazing bra I've practically been having dreams about (Victoria Secret Withdrawals are a real thing for super girly American girls... having one tiny store in a whole country that can serve to quell my cravings if even just for a moment is indispensable to a girl abroad!!). I wandered into the store and the lady asked if I needed any help. I pointed to the dream bra and she smiled and said, "Oh, yes! This is the only one we have left!"
O_O
WHAT?
My budget had given me two weeks to dream about the bra before I could financially afford to consider purchasing it if I was really responsible in all my other matters. But this changed everything. This was no longer children's games.
The lady asked me my size. I said I didn't know. At VS, this would be a signal for them to whip out their tape measure and start groping your upper body, but here in Classy Europe, this is a signal for the lady to stare at you incredulously and wonder how you call yourself a woman. >_< Fail.
"Well, this is an 85, so I think it'll fit you perfectly."
Bahahaha. An 85!? What the heck kind of bra size is that? Where's the letter? Why is the number so large? Huh? It's a great thing I didn't go with telling her what I'd thought my bra size to be. The strange glance she would have given me would have been way longer.
Needless to say, the bra was just as amazing as it had been in my dreams and I am eating nothing but pasta for the next week and a half.
Well worth it. ;)
By this time Ali was in Madrid, so I walked up Gran Via to meet her at the metro stop. Little did I know that the arrival of Ali meant that as wonderful and strange as my day had been up until this point, things were about to get a million times more amazing and weird!!!
The first thing we did was go to my appointment. The appointment I had been looking forward to for forever. The appointment I had made on a whim. The appointment I'd gone to Madrid last Thursday after it was dark at the last minute to set up. The appointment Ali ventured all the way into Madrid at night for. It was totally nerve-racking, and at one point I may or may not have begun to faint, but thanks to Ali's water bottle, pack of cookies and cheerful you-can-do-it attitude, I pulled through! And besides choosing to live in this amazing apartment with these amazing girls, it's the best decision I've made since I got here! ^_^ *in love and awestruck*
After my thirty minutes of rebellion and awesomeness, Ali decided it was her turn. :) We walked up Fuencarral (I LOVE that street!!! ^_^) and found her a piercing shop. Ironically, the same piercing shop in which I purchased my rather *epic* black bird belly button ring last summer that L gave me so much shit for. ;) Ali burst through the doors and asked how much a piercing would be. Twelve euros was definitely cheap enough to persuade her to go for it. I cheered her on as she paid they guy and went back with her. Unlike any piercing I've ever gotten, the guy just let us talk and then, without any warning, just did it. Oww!! >_< Ali squealed and giggled at the same time and I couldn't help but laugh myself. :) Haha! Poor Ali.
Completely hyped up on adrenaline and awesomeness, we went down the main "Hooker Avenue" of Madrid with the destination of PaPizza. :) Ali looked around at all the girls in their tall boots and tiny dresses, mesmerized. She'd never seen anything like it!
As we approached Sol, we were became engulfed in a sea of red flags and banners and quickly realized that we had just found ourselves in the jumping off point for the big "huelga" or, in English, "strike. N14 was the name of the strike and was poised to hit over 20 countries in the EU. People were everywhere, holding up their flags and listening to a speaker on the other side of the plaza. It felt like one of those history-in-the-making moments!
We took a few pictures and took in the scene and then headed for some much needed food.
Over pizza we continued to talk about the girls we had seen on that street moments earlier and we came up with a list of questions: Where do they go? How long do they go for? Do they work for one guy? How do they always look so presentable? Etc.
After dinner, Ali said she wanted to walk back up the street to see it all again. This turned into three strolls up and down the street, taking it all in. Just as we were about to finally leave, we saw a girl getting propositioned. Suddenly, she pulled out her cell phone, made a quick call, lit up a cigarette, and started walking so fast she was practically jogging. The guy followed a few meters behind her.
I looked at Ali. She looked at me. "How badly do you want to follow them right now?" I asked her. "Let's go!" squealed Ali. And we were off.
We walk/jogged on the other side of the street from them, trailing them just a bit. We only had to follow them for thirty seconds because the girl walked up the street, turned the corner and then entered a door marked "4," right next to an Asian buffet and the guy followed!!
Ali and I turned to each other, our jaws dropped. We felt like secret spies. We felt like we had just solved the hugest mystery Madrid had to offer. We felt like BAMFS. And so we did the natural thing, we stood behind a tree and waited for the pair to exit.
Four pairs went into that same door by the time the original ones exited - which was 20 minutes practically to the second they had entered. Ali and I couldn't believe what we were watching. It was sad, exhilarating, strange, depressing, intriguing and weird all at the same time. We stood there for over 45 minutes, just observing and talking about it all. We felt like we'd just entered an alternate reality and we couldn't pull ourselves out of it!
So someone finally came along that managed to do so for us.
Yeah, we had been standing by that tree on "Hooker Ave." for almost an hour. Yeah, there were a group of three girls standing feet away from us, clearing there working and clearly around our same age. But no, we did not have high boots nor short dresses. Hell, I had my crazy CUSTO jacket on! But we should have expected it.
An older, drunken man approached us. My instinct was to run. Ali's instinct (being the sweet girl she is) was to think the poor guy simply needed directions. He started saying something. Ali said she didn't understand. I quickly hid behind Ali, and grabbed on to our purses, ready to bolt. What ensued was a very odd discourse between those two - the man making fun of the way Ali said "forty" and Ali having no idea what was going on. I finally looked away, out of awkwardness and laughter and wtf-ness, but Ali said that as soon as the man began to gesture something was when she finally grabbed me and made a break for it.
Hahahahaha.
It took us the whole thirty minute walk back to the Atocha train station to process all that had just happened. While stopping to take pictures of the gorgeous lit up buildings and fountains, we giggled and squealed all the way home.
Being surrounded by friends all day long, having the day off of work, being in the city and in different parts of it, relaxing in the park, finding myself in super strange situations, yummy food, taking pictures... just, everything! Epic. Awesome. Amazing. Definitely one of those "European Adventure Dream Come True" days! ;)
Best. Day. Since. Arriving. By. Far. ^_^
XOXO
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